You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. There are several factors that motivate people to stay in the workforce, and money is the most important reason/factor. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 254 words.

Employees
are encouraged to perform in workplaces due to a variety of reasons. It is often argued that money is the key factor that motivates people to stay in these places for a longer period of time.
Although
I agree with
this
assertion, there are other factors which motivate
employees
to stay in an organisation for many years.
First
off, finance is the key factor which runs the world and helps humans manage demand and supply. Funds help humans to satisfy their needs and wants. When
employees
are given increments or higher salaries, they may able to improve their living standards.
For instance
, when
employees
are paid bonuses , they may invest in houses, and vehicles and help them to achieve their personal goals,
Hence
, motivating them to stay in a place for a prolonged period and perform at an optimum level.
Moreover
,
employees
work in extremely stressful environments, and due to high salaries, they may go travelling and spend some time with family and friends to relax and reduce their stress.
This
may be possible when they have enough funds to spend on leisure activities.
On the other hand
, there are various other reasons which benefit staff to become loyal to their employers. Staffs like to perform at the optimum level when they work in an environment, where they will be treated well and their job roles are connected with their passion .
This
may lead to them improving their skills and delivering the expected output.
Further
, Staff may like to move up their career ladder and achieve their ultimate goals
such
as becoming executive officers ,managers, or directors in their respective divisions.
Therefore
, there are many other factors that could influence employee retention in a company for a longer period. To sum up, companies can retain workers to a certain extent when they are paid well.
However
, there are many other reasons that could influence workers retention because of good working culture, clear career path and meeting workers' passion.
Submitted by Jay_Practise on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial stability
  • basic needs
  • career fulfillment
  • personal growth
  • social interaction
  • networking
  • job security
  • stable income
  • long-term employment
  • work-life balance
  • flexibility
  • intrinsic enjoyment
  • financial compensation
  • motivator
  • workforce
What to do next:
Look at other essays: