Some people believe that young people should follow older generation’s example. Others, however, disagree and believe that it’s good to challenge older people’s opinions and thoughts. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #generation’s #it’s #challenge #people’s #thoughts

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While

some say that it should be helpful for us to use experiences from older people, other people argue that it is more useful to change our minds and look at them with a critical view. In my opinion, we need to combine both views depending on the situation. On the one hand, the young do not have enough experience. And the life path can become much easier if some well-known patterns of behaviours are followed.

Furthermore

, the most obvious example can be taken from parents and grandparents.

Moreover

, the elder has a

huge

Fix the agreement mistake

lot of

show examples

experience and they can tell the right decisions in family questions, in case of work trouble, when you start renovating your apartment, or even about regions to live in and directions you may choose for greater well-being.

Nevertheless

, the older generation advises with pleasure and makes them feel significant, it is a total win-win scenario for both generations.

On the other hand

, if you follow someone's example you skip the main part of your life - finding your own path. I mean, that you need to look up methods for solving problems based on your skills and opportunities.

For example

, if your family now has enough money to pay for famous colleges or even university, you do not have

some

Correct determiner usage

any

show examples

reasons to earn money after school, like your grandparents. Especially, you do not have to get married before 25, if you have not found an appropriate partner or if you do not want to.

However

, our generations are different and we have to change game rules and need to adapt to the new modern world. In conclusion, there are a lot of changes in our trend and modern people must respect their past background, but have to seek their own path.

Although

, it is totally useful for us facing some difficulties to have opportunities to find good answers to any new questions.

Submitted by puhova on Sun Nov 13 2022

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task response

Your essay provides a balanced discussion of both views, but the task required a clear expression of your own opinion. Be sure to clearly state your own opinion in the future.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is generally effective, but there are some areas where clearer transitions and connections between ideas could be beneficial. Try to use more linking words and phrases to enhance coherence.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

316 words

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