Many things that used to be done in the home by hands are now being done by machines. Does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages.

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In
this
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new era , technology is so advanced that anything is created to make man's
life
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easier and faster.
That is
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how
machines
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became part of our everyday
life
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. In the following paragraphs, I will give some advantages and disadvantages of how
machines
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have impacted our lifestyles.
To begin
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, in the ’90s, the majority of our house tours were made by ourselves , washing clothes and dishes and even cooking.But now
machines
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are created to make our lives easier and faster . We now have
machines
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for almost everything
such
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as washing
machines
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for clothes and dishes , microwaves to heat our food , a blender to grind all kinds of vegetables and even a kettle to boil water . All these
machines
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save
time
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,especially for workers and help us to spend more
time
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concentrating on other important things in our
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life
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lives
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. We Can now spend less
time
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in the kitchen and more
time
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with family .
In contrast
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,
machines
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have made us lazy . In
another word
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other words
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, we are less productive and
this
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has a huge effect on our health.
For instance
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, doing housework by myself made me more active which can have a positive impact on my
Heath
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health
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.
Furthermore
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,Children and teenagers depend on
machines
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which makes them less productive, no
self esteems
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self-esteem
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because their practical sides have not been challenged. And when
there
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they
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are left alone in an environment without a machine , most of them hardly survive.
To conclude
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,
machines
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make our
life
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easier and faster and
also
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save us
time
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but
however
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, but it affects our health and our dependence on them is having an impact on our future children.
Submitted by crvenkatesh1904 on

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Task Achievement
Your essay contains some good points, but it lacks clear organization and structure. Make sure to clearly introduce the topic, provide a thesis statement, and support your main points with relevant examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear and logical structure. Work on organizing your ideas in a more coherent manner. Use topic sentences to clearly introduce each main point and ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Automation
  • Efficiency
  • Manual labor
  • Displacement
  • Homemaking skills
  • Technological advancements
  • Self-sufficiency
  • Resource depletion
  • Energy efficiency
  • Social dynamics
  • Operational understanding
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