Watching a live performance such as a play, concert, or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
When
people
participate in live performances
, namely plays, concerts, or sports competitions, they are more upbeat and enjoyable than when they watch the same occasion on television. I agree with the above-mentioned point of view, and some reasons will be elaborated on in the subsequent paragraphs.
Watching live performances
has more positive effects, such
as being delighted, than staying home and watching them on TV for some reasons. To begin
with, if young and old people
take part in live events
, they can relieve the stress of their technological and fast-paced lifestyles, although
watching live performances
on television does not need to pay money for tickets. In addition
, people
are able to provide a lively atmosphere for their children by going to such
events
. For instance
, when a child goes to a live concert instead
of staying at home, it makes her or him feel better. As a result
, relieving stress and having a memorable day can be some of the reasons for going to live performances
.
In other words
, individuals are capable of making more friends and getting familiar with other cultures and traditions when they participate in live concerts, ceremonies, and so on, although
everybody's home is a reliable yet convenient place. A person who immigrates to a new country is able to establish connections with other people
through live performances
, and this
is a great example of the effect of such
events
. As a consequence
, building a strong relationship with other people
is the other reason for watching live performances
.
In conclusion, live performances
, namely plays, concerts, or sports matches, grab people
’s attention more than those broadcast via the media, including TVs
, because they are more attractive and enjoyable. In my view, going to live Fix the agreement mistake
TV
events
can not only be beneficial but also
have a great influence on many people
.Submitted by elyas271 on
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task response
The introduction lacks a clear thesis statement which clearly states the writer's position on the topic. Consider clearly stating your stance in the introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph flows logically from the one before it, providing a clear structure to your essay. In some places, the connection between ideas could be made stronger to improve coherence.