IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #attention
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that the broadcasting of
products
Use synonyms
 is appealing to us, which convinced us to buy a product. While others believe that, promotional camping of
products
Use synonyms
 is so regular that now no one pays interest in it anymore. In my opinion,
advertisements
Use synonyms
 always charmed
people
Use synonyms
 in a unique way, which leads us to buy the product. To some
people
Use synonyms
, the announcement of
products
Use synonyms
 is influential as it declared its characteristics, benefits, demerits, how to use, why to use and so on,with a musical presentation which keeps us attracted toward the items.
This
Linking Words
 commercial promotion sometime motivates us to buy things and gives us options to choose from many.
For example
Linking Words
, the winter
products
Use synonyms
 campaign in the winter season influences us to buy cream, lip balm etc, with the thinking that, they will be more useful than the earlier
products
Use synonyms
 we already use.
However
Linking Words
, some individuals feel that because of the repetition of promotional ads,
advertisements
Use synonyms
 become monotonous as well as irritating. When we are into a serious cricket match, the billing of
products
Use synonyms
 is annoying at that moment which keeps
people
Use synonyms
 away from the television.
This
Linking Words
 makes
people
Use synonyms
 busy with other work without paying attention to a product camping.
For instance
Linking Words
, most
people
Use synonyms
 do household work in our country while a break from
advertisements
Use synonyms
 comes in between a movie. In my view, though some lacked interest in advertising, others are into it. The huge market of
advertisements
Use synonyms
 with its developed ideas of attracting
people
Use synonyms
 proves that the promotion of
products
Use synonyms
 works well on mortals. To sum up, considering both points discussed above; the most rational conclusion to be drawn is that, advertising influenced
people
Use synonyms
 without a doubt, though some tend to ignore
this
Linking Words
 fact.
Submitted by alina.aphrodite on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
What to do next:
Look at other essays: