For more and more people, wearing fashionable clothes has become very important. Is this attitude to wearing fashionable clothes a positive or a negative development?

#people #clothes #attitude #development

People from all walks of life are becoming dedicated followers of

fashion

, constantly trying to keep up-to-date with the latest

fashion

trends. There are both benefits and drawbacks to

this

;

however

, I personally feel that it borders on being more harmful than beneficial. Increased interest in

fashion

has resulted in fashionable clothing being more affordable for the masses. Previously, owning

such

items meant buying overpriced designer

clothes

and,

therefore

, it was only accessible to the wealthy and the privileged. In the

last

few decades,

however

, high-street chains have been producing trendy

clothes

at affordable prices to meet the greater demand of the general public.

As a result

fashion

is no longer a reserve for the rich, but is now accessible to all. which is a positive step forward in

this

regard.

On the other hand

, though,

this

desire to be stylish has greater negative consequences.

Firstly

, it has made

clothes

more disposable, as outfits are produced cheaply, worn on a couple of occasions and

subsequently

discarded.

This

causes a large amount of waste and exacerbates the problem of pollution.

In addition

this

, there is a great deal of pressure, particularly on the younger generation, to keep up with their peers.

For instance

, if a student is wearing the latest Nike trainers, and

consequently

, everyone in the class feels pressured into having the same or equally trendy footwear. In conclusion,

this

obsession with wearing the latest

fashion

trends has made

clothes

thrown away and not reusable.

Moreover

this

incessant need to have the latest must-have items puts far too much pressure on the environment and adolescents, so it cannot be regarded as progress.

Submitted by lenam2k1 on Sat May 25 2024

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task achievement

To achieve a higher score, consider further developing each argument with more extensive examples and analysis. For example, discuss specific environmental impacts or psychological effects on individuals.

task achievement

Improve the conclusion by summarizing both the benefits and drawbacks before stating your final opinion to provide a more balanced view.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Consider using more varied linking words and phrases to enhance flow.

coherence cohesion

Develop your points uniformly; some points, like societal pressures, are well discussed, while others, like affordability, could be expanded further.

introduction conclusion present

The essay has a clear and concise introduction which sets the stage for your arguments.

supported main points

Main points are well-supported with relevant examples, such as the mention of affordable high-street fashion and pressure among students.

introduction conclusion present

The introduction and conclusion effectively encapsulate the main arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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For more and more people, wearing fashionable clothes has become very important. Is this attitude to wearing fashionable clothes a positive or a negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people say history is one of the most important subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Opinions on food are changing rapidly and there are many who believe that everyone chould follow a vegetarian diet because it would have a positive impact in our health and the environment. Do you agree or disagree?

More and more animal species are becoming extinct by human activities in land and sea. What are the reasons and solutions?

topics: We live in a world of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages, the problems in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree

financial education should be included as a mandatory subject in schools to prepare students for managing money effectively. to what extent do you agree or disagree?