IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many students find it difficult to pay attention at school. What are the reasons for this? What could be done to solve this problem?

#students #attention #school
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The rate at which
students
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 have so many obstacles in their academic performance has become a global concern.
This
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 essay will be discussing both the reason and the solution to
this
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 problem. One major barrier affecting
students
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 in
institution
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institutions
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is finance,most
undergraduate
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undergraduates
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undergo
this
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 problem especially those from any average family ,so in
school
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Add a comma
,
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they have to struggle to survive and make the necessary payments
such
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 as
school
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 fees, hostel fees, feeding,hall dues etc which can bring distraction to their studies. In
this
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 case, the
school
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 should have a good welfare system that can provide
Add a hyphen
work-study
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work
Correct article usage
a work
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 study scheme that can enable
students
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 to work and study at their convenience.
Additionally
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,cultism and bad friends have become another issue which can play
negative
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a negative
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 role in student academic. Nowadays,
undergraduat
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undergraduate
undergraduates
 are being forced by colleagues to join
bad
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the bad
a bad
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gang
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gangs
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 and involved in activities like drinking alcohol,smoking and fornicating,thereby neglecting the main reason why they are in
school
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.
For instance
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, a student sent to university to study nursing, on arrival,he began to see how powerful some people are,how others make money and party, if he is not someone from proper home training, he will want to be like them and start seeking advice from them and
this
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 can cause bad impact on his academic. In
such
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 cases , parents have an important role to play, they should always advise their children about
such
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 friends and teach them how to be contented.
Lastly
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, case of incompetent lecturers or teachers, there is a saying that not everyone is born to teach. If there is a teacher
that is
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 not reliable and competent,
this
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 can may it difficult for
students
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 to pay attention especially when they don't understand what they are being taught. The institution should do a proper background check and get information about their experience and teaching capabilities before employing them.
Submitted by enaughetheresa on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • concentration
  • attention span
  • distractions
  • technology
  • boredom
  • tiredness
  • engagement
  • learning disabilities
  • teaching techniques
  • classroom size
  • family issues
  • health problems
  • motivational strategies
What to do next:
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