Some children can learn more efficiently by watching TV. Therefore, children should watch TV regularly both in school and at home? Do you agree or disagree?

#children #tv #school #home

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Some people think that

children

should watch

not only at

home

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apply

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but

also

school

, because, for them, watching

is more efficient for some

children

in terms of learning. I completely disagree with

this

idea, because it can be more effective to learn from

teachers

school

and by watching

home

equally,

also

watching it so much can be harmful

for

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show examples

their eyes.

First

of all, obviously watching

is very helpful for some

children

who want to learn something, but the combination of learning from

teachers

school

and

Change preposition

apply

show examples

watching

home

could be more beneficial. Despite the fact that

children

learn faster visually, they are not able to ask TVs question, but

teachers

Add a missing verb

do.

show examples

For example

, after learning a new lesson at

school

children

can improve their knowledge

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show examples

that lesson by watching something related to that on

home

then

if there are any unclear points, they can ask their

teachers

in the following days.

In addition

, if

children

were encouraged to watch

both in

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

and at

home

, it would lead them to spend too much time in front of

screen

Add an article

the screen

a screen

show examples

As a result

, they would face health problems

such

as weakness in their eyes(?). The rate of

children

who have issues in their eyes

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

been increasing for the

last

decades, as the usage of TVs

rise

Change the verb form

rises

show examples

up.

Therefore

, it could be

Correct your spelling

healthier

show examples

heathier

Correct your spelling

healthier

show examples

to less

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

time as much as possible which is spent

Change preposition

apply

show examples

watching

. To conclude, though watching

is effective for some

children

for learning, it would be better to use it only at

home

, because it reduces the time

children

spend in front of

screen

Add an article

the screen

a screen

show examples

, and help them to take advantage of both

teachers

and

Submitted by manqanat1 on Sun Nov 20 2022

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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Some children can learn more efficiently by watching TV. Therefore, children should watch TV regularly both in school and at home? Do you agree or disagree?

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English Learning, I'm looking to improve our relationship by setting some boundaries. Explain how you want to be treated in these sessions, using clear examples of your own to support the answer.

More and more people want to buy clothes, cars and other products from well-known brands. What are the reasons? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?