Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative trend?

#children #hours #smartphones #case #trend

Nowadays, smartphones play a vital role in people’s everyday lives.

However

, there are some groups of

children

who overuse them.

This

essay will elaborate on the reason why some

children

are allowed to spend too much

time

on digital devices and argue why I am of the opinion that

this

is a disadvantageous trend.

To begin

with, there are a number of contributing factors associated with

Correct article usage

the

show examples

usage of digital devices like

Add an article

a smartphone

the smartphone

show examples

smartphone

Fix the agreement mistake

smartphones

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

youngsters. The

first

reason is that some parents

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

fail in finding a suitable activity for their child.

For example

instead

of encouraging them to play sports, it might easier to let them

spending

Wrong verb form

spend

show examples

time

by themselves with a

smartphone

Secondly

Correct your spelling

caretakers

show examples

care takers

Correct your spelling

caretakers

show examples

do not realize

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

consequences of letting their

children

spend too much

time

on a screen. Research findings reveal that most adults do not know the fact that too much

screen-

Correct your spelling

screen time

show examples

time

impairs

children

’s both physical and mental

Fix the agreement mistake

health

show examples

healths

Correct your spelling

health

show examples

. Personally, I firmly believe that letting

youngster

Fix the agreement mistake

youngsters

show examples

spend too much

time

on a

smartphone

is a negative development. My reasoning is that

children

will lack

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

physical movements which encourage their

muscle

Fix the agreement mistake

muscles

show examples

and bone to fully developed. Studies suggested that inactive

children

who prefer playing games on a digital platform tend to have delayed physical development.

Furthermore

, another reason is when

children

become

addictive

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addicted

show examples

to the screen they will lack

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

essential social skills. To explain, they will be less

involve

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involved

show examples

Add an article

the face

a face

show examples

face to face

Add a hyphen

face-to-face

show examples

communication which leads to

having

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

poor interpersonal

skill

Fix the agreement mistake

skills

show examples

. In conclusion, while a lack of knowledge and awareness of parents leads to an over-reliance on

Add an article

the smartphone

a smartphone

show examples

smartphone

Fix the agreement mistake

smartphones

show examples

Change preposition

among

show examples

children

, I am of the opinion that

this

is a negative trend.

Submitted by nanthapat.a on Sun Nov 20 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

280 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative trend?

Fully explain your ideas

Research shows that business meetings, discussions and trainings are happening online nowadays. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this? What solutions can be offered.

Scientists tell us that some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that, millions of people still continue doing unhealthy activities. What are the causes and what are the solutions for this?

Some parents believe that learning mathematics at schools is redundant and should not be taught while others believe that it should remain a foundational subject whether or not it is used in later life. Discuss both sides.