Many scientists believe that now we can study the behavior of a three-year-old child to see whether they will grow up to be criminals. To what extent do you think crime is determined by human nature？ Is it possible to stop children from growing up to be criminals?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays, children's development is one of the most noticeable topics in the world. As science grows, some scientists claim that a person will become a criminal is depend on genes, while others argue that the environment and education are the main factors to determine whether a child admits to a crime in the future. Divergent as people's views on

this

Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

issue in question may be, I believe that human is good-natured and crime is a result of bad development. Of all the reasons why people believe that human

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

The spelling of behavior is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

show examples

is decided by

the

Correct article usage

apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples

genes, probably the most significant one is that

newborn

Correct article usage

a newborn

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples

baby's

Fix the agreement mistake

babies'

It seems that baby's may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

The spelling of behavior is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

show examples

is not the same which means the genes

determines

Change the verb form

determine

The verb determines does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples

our

natural

Replace the word

nature

The word natural doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, some

baby

Fix the agreement mistake

babies

It seems that baby may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples

always

cry

Change the verb form

cries

The plural verb cry does not appear to agree with the singular subject some baby. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

show examples

non stoppable

Add a hyphen

non-stoppable

It appears that non stoppable is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

show examples

, but for some baby is quite easy to stop crying via a toy.

This

Linking Words

simple example proves we are different even before receiving any education, and crime depends on human nature.

However

Linking Words

, I would believe that humans can change humanity with

good

Correct article usage

a good

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples

environment and appropriate education.

frankyimpMon Nov 21 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

169 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Although the medicine has made titanic advancements over the last few years, the trust in it has been in a decline. As a result, there is a growing demand for alternative medicines and treatments that do not heed established science and rely on traditional forms of treatments In my view, this development is a dire one and will have a significantly negative impact on general health.
6
band
n the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.
In the subsequent years, some individuals anticipate that all vehicles such as cars, buses and trucks will be moved without drivers. Personally, I wholeheartedly opine that there are various pros associated with this notion and I outline my reasons supporting this viewpoint.
6.5
band
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. * Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
In today's society, competition among people is a more common activity. Some people believe that competition in the workplace, at college, and in daily life is a beneficial activity. Others think that people should try to cooperate more rather than compete with each other. In this essay, I will discuss both views to gain an appropriate understanding, and I will support my opinions with concrete examples.
7.5
band
In some countries, people are purchasing fewer new items and more second-hand goods. What are the reasons for this? Is this positive or negative trend?
There has been quite an obvious discussion around the topic of second-hand products. While some people believe that consumers usually buy only new items, I would argue that many people spend money to buy second-hand items rather than new ones. I will explain my reasons in this essay.
6
band
Nowadays, people believe that the environment influences their accomplishments. Some people think their success and accomplishment were influenced by the places where they grew up. Do you think the environment does or does not affect people’s accomplishment and how it affects?
There is no denying the fact that people believe that the environment influences their accomplishments. While it is a commonly held belief that the environment impacts their success, there is also an argument that the environment helps people to succeed.

Many scientists believe that now we can study the behavior of a three-year-old child to see whether they will grow up to be criminals. To what extent do you think crime is determined by human nature？ Is it possible to stop children from growing up to be criminals?

Fully explain your ideas

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

n the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages.

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. * Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

In some countries, people are purchasing fewer new items and more second-hand goods. What are the reasons for this? Is this positive or negative trend?

Nowadays, people believe that the environment influences their accomplishments. Some people think their success and accomplishment were influenced by the places where they grew up. Do you think the environment does or does not affect people’s accomplishment and how it affects?