IS IT QUITE RIGHT THAT TOP SPORTS PEOPLE SHOULD BE PAID A LOT OF MONEY ? (TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE)

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I highly disagree with the statement mentioned above as authentic sportsmanship constitutes
of
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apply

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equal rights amongst all
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

sports people
Correct your spelling
sportspeople

The word sports people seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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. Equal rights here
being
Wrong verb form
are

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denoted as equal paying opportunities. It is disheartening to my belief that top
players
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are always paid a lot of money if compared to their peers, sometimes even more than
entire
Correct article usage
the entire

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team
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combined.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This

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is very biased
to
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toward

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the top
player
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as every other
player
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on the
team
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contributes a very similar work ethic and
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort

It seems that efforts may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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towards the
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Use synonyms
sports
Fix the agreement mistake
sport

It seems that sports may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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. Every
player
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chosen to be performing the sport has been working hard
with
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to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the best of their abilities and talent to be anticipated among the
sports
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

team
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.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

scenario always
misbalance
Correct your spelling
misbalances

The word misbalance doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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the pay budget which is supposed to be divided among the
team
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players
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,
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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equated to :
top
Correct article usage
the top

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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player
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sharing a higher percentage of the overall budget. Which often leads the other
players
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to
lower paying
Add a hyphen
lower-paying

It seems that lower paying is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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opportunities.
Linking Words
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase Also. Consider adding a comma.

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the moral rule of
sports
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

being
Wrong verb form
is

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb being. Consider changing it.

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Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

team work
Correct your spelling
teamwork

The word team work seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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and
team
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spirit, as
combined
Add an article
the combined
a combined

The noun phrase combined contribution seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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contribution of every
sport
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sports

It appears that the noun sport is being used as an adjective, but you may have chosen incorrectly between the singular and plural form. Consider changing the noun form.

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player
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

makes the
sports
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appalling and highly intriguing amongst the wide audience cheering for the
sports
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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do agree that every
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
sports
Change to a singular noun
sport

The singular quantifier every is followed by the plural noun sports. Consider changing the noun to the singular or using a different quantifier.

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has
Change the verb form
have

The singular verb has does not appear to agree with the plural subject every sports. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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a most-valuable
player
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

(MVP), which of course re-directs the
team
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

approach towards the
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
sports
Fix the agreement mistake
sport

It seems that sports may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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overall, but getting paid a lot of money as compared to the other
players
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is completely unjust to every other
player
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in the
team
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

breaking their sweat to make the
team
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

craftsmanship a priority.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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believe that
fame
Correct article usage
the fame

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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of any
sports
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

player
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can be biased as its highly subjected to the audience perceiving the
sports
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, but paying opportunities should not vary drastically among the top and the other
players
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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