Task 2: some cities create housing for their growing population by providing taller buildings. Other cities create housing by building on wider areas of land. Which solution is better?
Recent years have witnessed the explosion of population in many parts of the world leading to housing problems.
While
many cities choose high concrete constructions as a solution for this
dilemma, others expand their areas for more accommodations. This
essay will shed light on the negative and positive aspects of both two measures before concluding that I am inclined toward the former.
Granted, widening cities’ areas in order to supply more space for dwellers has particular advantages. The first benefit of this
measure is that The more land
possessed by citizens, the higher the probability for them to build large houses such
as mansions without any limitations as available apartments. Besides
that, land houses
ensure the family’s privacy with fences and walls to separate their space completely from that of their neighbours. Correct your spelling
landhouses
However
, there are still side effects in this
trend. Chief among these is the potential risks to the environment. That said, extending cities' land
for housing means deforestation or taking away suburbs' landscapes to serve for
construction projects, which cause noise pollution and require huge amounts of energy.
Notwithstanding the aforementioned solution, the idea of using high-rise apartments as a means to remedy the situation of a growing number of citizens is much more convincing regardless of the likely limited space. Change preposition
apply
This
can be attributed to two primary rationales. With the bombardment of population, high concrete buildings can allocate enough accommodations to tailor massive demands with much more reasonable prices than land
houses, for they necessitate less land
used than the latter for the same number of dwellings. In addition
to this
, shared buildings facilitated with public amusement sites encourage social interactions among both adults and children, from whom are significantly benefited especially for healthy mental toughness.
In conclusion, while
cities solve accommodation problems by creating housing on expanding land
, I believe that constructing multi-floor buildings is better owing to their prices and boosting connection among individuals.Submitted by mylinhlee27 on
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Language and Grammar
Revise to ensure consistent use of articles. For example, use 'land houses' consistently or consider 'houses built on land.'
Task Achievement
Incorporate specific examples to add more depth and relevance to your points. This can significantly enhance the strength of your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
Increase the coherence between the paragraphs by including more transitional phrases. This can further strengthen the logical structure of your essay.
Introduction
The introduction is clear and sets the stage well for the subsequent discussion.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides a clear stance on the topic.
Task Response
The essay logically presents the pros and cons of both approaches, allowing for a balanced discussion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?