Some people think that many renowned personalities are popular because of their riches and extravagant lifestyle, rather than their achievements, and this influences the youth in a negative way.

Some

people

Use synonyms

say that the majority of celebrities are well-known due to their wealth and

luxury

Replace the word

luxurious

show examples

lifestyle

instead

Linking Words

of their successes and

this

Linking Words

has a negative impact on young

people

Use synonyms

. Overall I agree with the statement. In

this

Linking Words

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will explain why.

To begin

Linking Words

with , the chief reason why

starts

Correct your spelling

stars

show examples

and athletes are famous is social media.

That is

Linking Words

, the more financial aspects of their life

Change the verb form

are

show examples

published on the Internet , the more their hard-workings and achievement will be ignored. A good example of

this

Linking Words

is Beckam`s family ,who have worked

hardly

Replace the word

hard

show examples

for many years ,all of their trips and cars are always on the websites .

This

Linking Words

in turn media content would have a significant effect on

audience

Add an article

the audience

show examples

about intrusive famous

people

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

teenagers are likely to consider celebrities ,introduced

Replace the word

were

show examples

where by

Correct your spelling

whereby

show examples

Internet

Correct article usage

the Internet

show examples

and News , as their role models. To put it differently , as long as

wealth

Correct article usage

the wealth

show examples

and

fancy

Correct article usage

the fancy

show examples

lifestyle of stars

appears

Change the verb form

appear

show examples

to the youth, they will probably set financial goals as

a lifelong ambitions

Correct the article-noun agreement

lifelong ambitions

a lifelong ambition

show examples

. take

low

Correct article usage

the low

show examples

tendency of students for higher education

for example

Linking Words

; they tend to make money

instead

Linking Words

of going

university

Change preposition

to university

show examples

.So as result , not only

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society will

be face

Change the verb form

be faced

show examples

with a lack of specialists and inventors , but

also

Linking Words

the young

people

Use synonyms

miss a chance

Change preposition

for

show examples

personal development in their lifetime. To sum up , I personally take the view that the young can be affected inappropriately by

luxury

Add an article

the luxury

a luxury

show examples

lifestyle of well-known individuals .

This

Linking Words

is because, they

just

Add a missing verb

are just

show examples

represented through social nets as

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

rich models, irrespective of their efforts and

prosperities

Replace the word

prosperity

show examples

noorihaniye69

Nov 21, 2022

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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Some people think that many renowned personalities are popular because of their riches and extravagant lifestyle, rather than their achievements, and this influences the youth in a negative way.

In many countries people of all ages do sports and exercises a lot. Does this trend have more advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Many criminals resort back to crime as soon as they are released from prison. What do you think are the causes for this? What possible solutions can you suggest?

Some people think that the main factors influencing a child's development these days are things such as television, friends and music. Others believe that the family still remains more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that printed books are no longer needed in the digital era, because all writing can be stored electronically. Others think printed books will still play an important role. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.