SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT A SENSE OF COMPETITION IN CHILDREN SHOULD BE ENCOURAGED. OTHERS BELIEVE THAT CHILDREN WHO ARE TAUGHT TO CO OPERATE RATHER THAN COMPETE BECOME MORE USEFUL ADULTS.
It is often argued that competitive children are much better than cooperative youngsters in many spheres of life as a child and
adult
. I think that every person despite Fix the agreement mistake
adults
of
age has their own individual Change preposition
apply
skills
that
is
unique and useful for various occurrences.
Change the verb form
are
To begin
with, competition is beneficial
ability for growing independent and being confident among other rivals. Correct article usage
a beneficial
However
, competitive people
are less desired to obey someone is
rules and leads, which is a horrible trouble in Correct your spelling
someone's
teamworking
. While cooperative young Correct your spelling
team working
people
are more like to be good leaders in group works
. Fix the agreement mistake
work
On the other hand
, they are seemed to hand on
teammates, and it is a bit hard Change preposition
with
to
them to make tasks Change preposition
for
for
their own. Change preposition
on
For example
, the
competitive workers have their own Correct article usage
apply
principals
, so they are having difficulties with colleagues in choosing Correct your spelling
principles
best
way of problem Add an article
the best
solution
at the job. Struggling at Replace the word
solving
workplace
has cooperated ones Add an article
the workplace
to
, in the individual projects in the office they are more like to fail their report assignment. Both Replace the word
too
type
of skilled Change to a plural noun
types
group
has own benefits Fix the agreement mistake
groups
as
disadvantages too.
Correct word choice
and
Furthermore
, competitive individuals are achiever
Fix the agreement mistake
achievers
from
their natures, it is hard to imagine them without clear goals for Change preposition
in
a
life and, they are doing Remove the article
apply
best
of trying to achieve Correct pronoun usage
their best
Correct pronoun usage
their dream
dream
despite the difficulties on the way. Fix the agreement mistake
dreams
For instance
, achievers are mostly popular sport
game players or professional dancers with a worthy motivation to be number one. But cooperative Fix the agreement mistake
sports
people
have improved social skills
, which is important to make higher
reputation. Socially developed workers are creative for new Add an article
a higher
project
works and have a big chance of promotion in Fix the agreement mistake
projects
Correct pronoun usage
their career
career
. So, everyone Fix the agreement mistake
careers
instead
of competitive
or cooperative side Add a missing verb
being competitive
making
good achievements and results in special occurrences.
To conclude, children Wrong verb form
makes
high
sense of competition seemed to be Add an article
a high
good
and independent Add an article
a good
achiever
with unique Fix the agreement mistake
achievers
principals
and cooperative young Correct your spelling
principles
people
will grow as a good leaders
and best team Correct the article-noun agreement
a good leader
good leaders
worker
with improved social Fix the agreement mistake
workers
skills
. I think the
both Correct article usage
apply
of
Change preposition
apply
personal
Correct pronoun usage
my personal
skills
are good enough and there is no needing
to choose which one is best.Change the form of the verb
need
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!