Many person are opting for several career options as compared to a single career option to earn more money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#person #career #options #option #money

Nowadays, occupational choices are altering to keep up with the developing world.

People

are

prefering

Correct your spelling

preferring

preparing

for various

career

paths

opposed

Correct word choice

as opposed

show examples

to one-way

career

option

Fix the agreement mistake

options

show examples

to make more money.

Although

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

single

Correct article usage

a single

show examples

career

could be much

Change the word

apply

show examples

easier, I completely agree with opting

several

Change preposition

for several

show examples

career

options is more logical

instead

of hoping for help in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

one

job

because the incomes which employers give have experienced a dramatical decrease recently. Working in a single

job

is easier than working another

job

additionally

. Employees who prefer

single

Correct article usage

a single

show examples

career

have

a limited responsibilities

Correct the article-noun agreement

a limited responsibility

limited responsibilities

show examples

about

Change preposition

show examples

their jobs. They can concentrate

their

Change preposition

on their

show examples

jobs

Correct your spelling

regardless

regarless

Correct your spelling

regardless

of thinking after

Change the article

the

show examples

main

job

, what will ı do in

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

second

job

As a result

this

people

will be less

stressful

Replace the word

stressed

show examples

in their lives and they can perform their capacities at the maximum level.

On the other hand

,being

advance

Wrong verb form

advanced

show examples

in a single

job

is not sufficient to earn enough money to survive because taken incomes decreased each every

job

For example

, twenty years ago, students

had

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

graduated

the

Change preposition

from the

show examples

university and

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

started a

job

with

Change preposition

show examples

the department. The revenue which they take

compansated

Correct your spelling

compensated

the most of their demands.

However

, these days,

people

have more features compared to previous

people

Therefore

, the number of

Add an article

the person

a person

show examples

person

Change to a plural noun

people

show examples

who can do a certain

job

increased.

Thus

, employers are declining

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

salaries because they know employees have to earn money. So,

people

working actively in a

job

need to work a

second

job

at least for making their lives more livable. In conclusion, There is a changing human habit which is

Correct your spelling

preferring

prefering

Correct your spelling

preferring

multidirectional

Correct article usage

a multidirectional

show examples

career

way compared to the traditional method. I strongly believe that every person

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

to keep pace with

this

condition because of low incomes even if having

one-way

Add an article

a one-way

the one-way

show examples

job

Change the word

apply

show examples

easier.

Submitted by merttufan197 on Wed Nov 23 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

292 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

economic necessity
gig economy
income diversification
personal fulfillment
technological advancements
digital platforms
work-life imbalance
stress and burnout
wage stagnation
rising cost of living

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Many person are opting for several career options as compared to a single career option to earn more money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

today the high sales of Polular consumer goods reflect the power of advertisng and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold to what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion

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Some people believe that we have too many choices these days. To what extent to you agree or disagree? To what extent do you agree or disagree?