some people say it is important to keep your home and your workplaceI tidy. with everything organized and in the correct place what is your opinion about this

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
I think it is im[portant to keep my
house
Use synonyms
and
workplace
Use synonyms
tidy and clean with all things managed and in the correct situation. Why is
this
Linking Words
? My home must be tidy to keep my family safe. If my home is tidy and electricity lines and toys and shoes and books are organized and in the correct place no one is going to fall over and
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
damage their body. One day my friend
Mohosin
Correct your spelling
Mohsin
walked
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
his home to answer a person that come to his
house
Use synonyms
door. He looked at the door. He didn't look at the floor and he fall over one shoe and
then
Linking Words
he went to the hospital to have his head sewen.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, If people arrive and my
house
Use synonyms
is
Correct your spelling
untidy
nontidy
Correct your spelling
untidy
,
then
Linking Words
I can suffer
embarrassed
Replace the word
embarrassment
show examples
. My family and my friends like to see my
house
Use synonyms
tidy and clean. I like to see my
house
Use synonyms
clean. My
workplace
Use synonyms
must be tidy so everything is organized. If my
workplace
Use synonyms
is organized I think I can do more
work
Use synonyms
.I can do
this
Linking Words
work
Use synonyms
because all my time is for my
work
Use synonyms
. Sometimes I go to
work
Use synonyms
and all my time I have to spend looking for my
work
Use synonyms
. My desk is dirty and the paper is all over the top and my time is taken by looking for what I want to do and
I
Correct pronoun usage
what I
show examples
need to do.
This
Linking Words
is so terrible and now I think it's important to keep my
workplace
Use synonyms
managed and all things in the correct situation.
Also
Linking Words
, If I need to find pens or pencils it is easy when organized. To conclude in a nutshell
keep
Replace the word
keeping
show examples
house
Use synonyms
and
workplace
Use synonyms
tidy is a good thing because I can find my things, my
my
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
family like it,
It
Correct word choice
and It
show examples
is safe.
Submitted by indunil14 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: