Some people think that students should play more team sports, such as football and volleyball, rather than individual sports, such as running and swimming. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #students #team #sports #football #volleyball

It is argued that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

Correct your spelling

adolescents

adolecents

Correct your spelling

adolescents

should pay more

Correct your spelling

attention

attantion

Correct your spelling

attention

improve

Wrong verb form

improving

show examples

teamwork by playing outdoor activities like football and volleyball rather than

sports

which are played individually. In my opinion, participating in

team

sports

might be the best option for everybody since

such

kind of

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

activities that

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

been played as a

team

can

also

help students to boost their thinking abilities.

This

essay will provide an argument for both statements. On the one hand, these days one of the best ways of enhancing

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

critical thinking is by taking part in

team

sports

since they

Correct your spelling

create

show examples

creat

Correct your spelling

create

show examples

an opportunity for individuals to improve their thinking while playing a certain game.

Furthermore

, in today’s contemporary world, there are a number of cyber

sports

are

Correct pronoun usage

that are

show examples

also

widely available through

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

social media which can

also

Correct your spelling

create

show examples

creat

Correct your spelling

create

show examples

a significant number of opportunities that help especially students

for

Change preposition

with

show examples

mental improvement. Taking PUBG MOBILE as an example which is one of the most popular and effective

way

Change to a plural noun

ways

show examples

to improve teamwork has been played by over 1000000000 humans.

On the other hand

, there are

also

some obvious beneficial sites of individual

sports

especially

Add the comma(s)

,especially

show examples

for people who are willing to be healthy and fit since while humans are doing these

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

activities they

also

might be able to focus on only training and

get

Wrong verb form

getting

show examples

fit rather than

sports

which are played as a

team

which are especially aimed to improve mentality.

For example

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

recent studies

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

shown that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

majority

Correct article usage

the majority

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

humans who are physically strong and fit have mostly played individual

sports

rather than those who mainly take part in

team

sports

. To conclude, having weighed everything mentioned

Change preposition

apply

show examples

I can come to the conclusion

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that, it would be the best choice for students to

Correct your spelling

concentrate

consentrate

Correct your spelling

concentrate

playing

Change preposition

on playing

show examples

team

sports

since they help them to be more productive

Correct your spelling

oin

Correct your spelling

their studies.

Submitted by Premium Version on Mon Nov 28 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

307 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Housing wastage in big cities can cause severe social consequences.Some people think only government action can solve this problem.To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Depicted in the bar chart is the data that shows a comparison amongst the number of deaths caused by six diseases such as AIDS, Leproxy, tropical diseases, diarrhea, and TB. The presented graph describes data from a research that was observed in Someland in 1990.
4.5
band
Some people think that music is a good way of bringing people of different culteres and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
It is widely believed that one of the good ways to connect individuals of some cultures and ages together is music. Personally, I can neither completely agree or disagree with this statement for a variety of reasons.
6
band
In some countries, young people often decide to work or travel for a time before they start their university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of doing this. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In today's contemporary era, many people worldwide prefer to work or travel before starting their higher education. This leads to both merits and demerits which will be discussed in paragraphs below.
6.5
band
There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The academic curriculum of educational institutions tends the students to remain engaged with the preparation of upcoming examinations. Some educationalist advocates for excluding the extracurricular subjects like physical education and cookery from their syllabus so that youngsters can consume their time for academic activities efficiently. However, the strategy seems unreasonable to me as it will deprive the students of achieving multitasking skills and make the academic journey monotonous. The essay aims to discuss the concerned issues elaborately.
4
band
There is moral essentially nowadays for the Valuable countries of the earth to support the lowest countries develop in terms of feeding the nation, study and health care.
There is moral essentially nowadays for the Valuable countries of the earth to support the lowest countries develop in terms of feeding the nation, study and health care. One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is a lack of development special treatment,education and feeding. Now rich countries are beginning to figure it out this issue in poor countries.Personally i tend to suppose that it will be the greatest way to support economic low countries. Firstly it is well known that we live in 21 century,century of technology and medicine. What i mean here is that technology progress in poor countries can upgrade study capacity,if nation are smart they had enough possibilities to work prestige jobs.For instance i really believe if people are educated,they can grow up their country economic like ABC. An excellent case in this point is developing in all waysides,especially healthcare,feeding and education. On other hand,it can also be argued that two sides well and low developed countr...

Some people think that students should play more team sports, such as football and volleyball, rather than individual sports, such as running and swimming. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Housing wastage in big cities can cause severe social consequences.Some people think only government action can solve this problem.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that music is a good way of bringing people of different culteres and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, young people often decide to work or travel for a time before they start their university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of doing this. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There is moral essentially nowadays for the Valuable countries of the earth to support the lowest countries develop in terms of feeding the nation, study and health care.