some people think the news has no connection to people's lives so it is a waste of time to read the news in the newspaper and watch TV news program  to what extent do you agree or disagree

Some people assume that
news
is not related to people's lives .
Therefore
‚ you will lose time when you follow
other's
Fix the agreement mistake
others'
show examples
information through reading newspapers and watching TV
news
. Nowadays we live in a very developed world where is easy to know all the
news
‚anything related to the population you can know about it by reading magazines ‚newspapers ‚watching television or even listening to the radio. In my opinion‚ it is very important to find out and to know the
news
in any field on the planet ‚because it makes us live in
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
village ‚
besides
we can be more cultured by discovering new things about others. ,
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
show examples
we connect with each other‚ and get to know more when we are informed with a variety of stories
around
Change preposition
about
show examples
a lot of areas ‚
although
it takes time ‚ it is fun and beneficial ‚
also
we can learn many things and be aware of what is happening daily around us
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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
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