Many students choose to study at colleges and universities that are far away from the places where they grew up. Do the benefits of this outweigh the drawbacks?

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Leaving their hometown to start
university
life is becoming more common for many
students
.
This
essay will argue that
although
it may make their journey financially more challenging,
such
a decision is far more advantageous because it leads to independence. As
students
depart from their usual residence to live in a new place, they often encounter a number of financial difficulties without parental support.
Besides
tuition fees, other expenses from accommodation, living costs or travel expenditures
also
add a great part to their constant worries, especially in costly cities like New York or Tokyo.
For example
, at the start of every new enrollment season at the National
University
of Tokyo, thousands of international first-year
students
and those who come from other domestic remote regions are seen to go on an intense apartment hunting with the hope of getting a cheap and convenient shelter. Troublesome as it is,
but
Correct word choice
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I believe that undergraduates can easily settle those monetary obstacles by having one or several part-time jobs in their availability. The great advantage of studying in a distant
university
or college is that it offers young people opportunities to explore and experience new things freely and independently.
This
is to say that independent life not only allows
university
-goers to live the lifestyle they long for but
also
teaches them essential soft skills that are vital to their later life as responsible adults.
For instance
, at many top universities in Ho Chi Minh City in Vietnam, it is noticeable that
students
, who come from other provincial areas, are usually more mature and outperform their city counterparts, who are living with their parents, in social skills and activities that require teamwork and problem-solving skills thanks to their found independence and rapid adaptation. Many of them are
also
revealed to be more financially stable than their classmates after a time of having a part-time job.
Therefore
, I am of the opinion that studying far away from home brings
students
more benefits than drawbacks. In conclusion, despite the fact that starting a
university
journey at a far place could cause
students
some financial problems at
first,
the significant benefit of being independently developed far outweighs its drawbacks.
Submitted by nha7032463 on

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task achievement
Try to provide a broader variety of examples to enhance the argument. Including instances from different contexts or parts of the world could make your point more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Organize paragraphs clearly and ensure each one starts with a clear topic sentence that signals its main idea. This will help readers follow your argument more easily.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural sensitivity
  • personal growth
  • adaptability
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • specialized programs
  • networking
  • career opportunities
  • homesickness
  • cultural shock
  • financial strain
  • accommodation
  • cost of living
  • family relationships
  • emotional challenges
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