IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many government think that economic progress is their most important goal .some people, however ,think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#government #progress #people #country
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Use synonyms
Economy
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The economy
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 is key of standard living and quality of life. economic
growth
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is plays
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plays
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vital
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the vital
a vital
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role
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of
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in
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development
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developing
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country
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countries
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.
Instead
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, other aspects are
also
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 important for
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growth
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the growth
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 of the
country
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. There
are
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is
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balance
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a balance
the balance
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 of
economy
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 and other services provided by
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government
Correct article usage
the government
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it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 would help
to
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apply
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wealthy
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the wealthy
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Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
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. I will discuss both points of view and give my personal opinion on
this
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 matter. On the one hand ,
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economy
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the economy
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 has been playing
most
Correct article usage
the most
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 important
role
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for
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in
show examples
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country
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the country
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. Economic
growth
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 has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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decrease
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decreasing
decreased
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 poverty and
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increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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standard
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the standard
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 of living life .
For example
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, In India , poverty is declining gradually because
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government
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the government
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 has been focusing on how to
increase
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Use synonyms
economy
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the economy
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 of
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country
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the country
a country
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. They should
as
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apply
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possible
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possibly
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 try to give
Correct your spelling
higher
high
higer
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higher
 performance for
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Correct article usage
the country
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country
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country's
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Correct your spelling
development
devlopment
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development
 by
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economy
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the economy
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, Which might
in
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apply
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results
Correct subject-verb agreement
result
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into
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in
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 poverty decreasing people who would live quality of life.
Furthermore
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,
GDP
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 is based on
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economy
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the economy
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 so,
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economy
Replace the word
economic
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growth
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 will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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increase
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 .
similarly
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,
GDP
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also
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increase
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.
GDP
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 and
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interest
intrest
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interest
 rates are inversely proportional . When
GDP
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 will
increase
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Correct your spelling
interest
intrest
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interest
 rates go down, for individual beings to consume more which increases,
therefore
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, the
GDP
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.
On the other hand
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 , there are many
way
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ways
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 to
devlopment
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development
 of
country
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. Not only economic progress plays
crucial
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a crucial
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role
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 but
also
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, other aspects like education, health and transportation are equally significant important for
nation's
Correct article usage
a nation's
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 upliftment.
For instance
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, Japan had
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Correct article usage
an economy
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economy
Replace the word
economic
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 crisis five decades ago. When
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government
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the government
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had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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decided to Invest in child education, Nowadays, Japan is one of the most developed
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country
Change to a plural noun
countries
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 in the world. In conclusion, The financial system plays
important
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an important
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role
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 to make a
country
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 wealthy. But , other types of progress should be equally important. My opinion is that
government
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 should balance
progress
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the progress
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 of the
Correct your spelling
development
devlopment
Correct your spelling
development
Submitted by jeetkacha13 on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gross domestic product (GDP)
  • socio-economic development
  • quality of life
  • stakeholder
  • sustainable development
  • public sector
  • non-governmental organization (NGO)
  • civic engagement
  • green technology
  • quality of education
  • universal healthcare
  • cultural integrity
  • global competitiveness
  • human capital
  • innovation ecosystem
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