IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

The best way to solve the world’s environmental problem is to increase the price of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#world’s #price #fuel
There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate over whether a hike in the
fuel’s
Change noun form
fuel
show examples
price
 is the best tactic to deal with the worldwide environmental issue. In my opinion, I would contend that I partially disagree with
this
 statement.  It is obvious to note that raising the
price
 of
fuel
 is not the optimal method to save the
environment
. On account of
inelastic
Correct article usage
the inelastic
show examples
 demand for oil
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 human activities and almost all of the transportation they are using now are powered by gas.
Moreover
, even if
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fuel
 prices are ever-increasing currently, people still decide to pay for it.
For example
 in Vietnam,
although
 the government just hiked the
price
 of
fuel
 a month ago, citizens still want to utilize gasoline since they need to go to work and go to school every day. So, the growth in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fuel
 prices makes no difference in the number of 4-wheeled vehicles used. While
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 ineffective influence of the increase in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fuel’s
Change noun form
fuel
show examples
price
 is widely-acknowledged, there is a wealth of more far-reaching alternatives to address the environmental issues,
such
 as taking advantage of electric hybrid vehicles. As they are powered by renewable energy, which does not release greenhouse gas so that the air quality of the
environment
 can not be harmed.
For instance
, Vinfast should be cited as one of the most remarkable examples of
car
Correct article usage
a car
show examples
make
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
 in Vietnam because it has an environmentally-friendly car system. Not only does it meet the travel needs of people on a regular basis, but it
also
 does not bring a negative impact on the air quality of the
environment
.
Therefore
, making use of electric means of transportation is one of the most effective ways to reduce the massive exhaust fumes, which can protect the
environment
 well.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fuel consumption
  • renewable energy
  • emissions
  • electric vehicles
  • low-income families
  • commute
  • fuel-efficient technologies
  • public transport infrastructure
  • global disparity
  • developing nations
  • alternative energy sources
  • sustainable practices
  • economic impact
  • conservation efforts
  • environmental sustainability
What to do next:
Look at other essays: