IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Fewer and fewer people want to become teachers especially in secondary schools. Why this happening and what can be done to tackle this problem?

#people #teachers #schools
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Education is the fundamental building block of a society. Nowadays
people
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 are not interested
to become
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in becoming
show examples
educators
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, especially in high schools.
This
Linking Words
 essay will highlight the principal causes and the solutions to resolve them. First and foremost, a lack of interest in becoming
teachers
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 in the present day is
due to
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 the low income of a teacher.
Teachers
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 are being paid much
lesser
Correct word choice
less
show examples
, especially in public schools as compared to other jobs in the private sector.
For example
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, an adult who works as a pharmacist in a private hospital can earn twice as much as a secondary school teacher.
This
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 demotivates the public from pursuing a career in the education field.
Furthermore
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, another problem is that teenagers are very difficult to deal with, and students in secondary schools tend to disobey
teachers
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' orders.
However
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, we can take several measures to solve these issues. One practical solution to
this
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 problem is that the government can increase the
wage
Fix the agreement mistake
wages
show examples
 of
educators
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. By increasing the salary of
educators
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,
people
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 are more likely to work as
teachers
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.
In other words
Linking Words
, a person who is passionate about teaching will be motivated to work harder and contribute to the community.
Moreover
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, the government can offer scholarships to students to
further
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 their studies as
teachers
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.
As a result
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,
people
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 with financial problems can afford to pursue higher education and become successful
teachers
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. In conclusion,
although
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 fewer
people
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 want to become
educators
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 in today's world,
such
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 a challenge can be solved with proper planning. The government plays an important role
to encourage
Change preposition
in encouraging
show examples
 the public to become
educators
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.
Submitted by khaishien.hong on

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task response
Ensure that you fully address all parts of the question. Make sure to provide convincing arguments and relevant examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of the logical flow of your ideas. Ensure that your ideas are organized and linked coherently.
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