Some people believe that success is earning money. Others believe that success is defined by personal happiness. Discuss both sides and give your own opino

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How do we determine whether someone is successful or not? What is the main requirement we use to define it? It is argued by a large number of

people

Use synonyms

that if we are wealthy, it means we are so successful while others think that personal

happiness

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level is the key criterion for success. I agree with

people

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who believe that our own

happiness

Use synonyms

is a more essential requirement to define success. In

this

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essay, I shall discuss both sides of

this

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controversial argument. On the one hand,

money

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is definitely powerful ‘weapon’ that we utilize to live more successfully.

Firstly

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, we are capable to buy almost everything

that is

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needed.

For instance

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, if you want to live in an enormous mansion, it is just enough to purchase it. If you want to drive a more attractive car,

such

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as Ferrari, or Bugatti, just do the same thing.

Secondly

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, wealth can give you an opportunity to influence society due to the fact that reputation and authority follow

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

money

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. As we know, most famous

people

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, who can affect the world

such

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as Elon Musk, Bill Gates, and Jeff Bezos, are all wealthy

people

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On the other hand

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, personal

happiness

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can make your life gorgeous.

First

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of all, if you are joyful, your surrounding will

also

Linking Words

get happy.

In other words

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, you can have a good relationship with other

people

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around you.

Furthermore

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happiness

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might keep your body healthy, which is the most important thing to live successfully. The study conducted by WHO illustrates that happy

people

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live relatively longer and victorious than other

people

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. To conclude,

although

Linking Words

money

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is the key factor in a successful life, it, in my opinion, is more effective to define success as joy. If we cannot live joyfully for the rest of our life, is it more important to have earned a lot of

money

Use synonyms

ET21002ndgroupTue Nov 29 2022

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

309 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Financial stability
Quality of life
Societal respect
Fulfillment
Mental well-being
Emotional well-being
Personal happiness
Strong relationships
Pursuing passions
Balanced life
Meaningful experiences
Holistic sense of accomplishment
Cultural perspectives
Communal well-being
Individual achievements

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Some people believe that success is earning money. Others believe that success is defined by personal happiness. Discuss both sides and give your own opino

Having babies later can have more negatives than positive effects on young adult? What is pros and cons about having babies later and how do you think?

A country becomes more interesting and develops more quickly when its population includes a mixture of nationalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?