The percentage of overweight children in the western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years.Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.

#percentage #children #society #ten #years #effects #trend

In the present age, many people are concerned about their

weight

, but it is not always just because of

the

Change the word

their

show examples

looks. It has been noticed that more and more children are overweight which can result in a variety of serious health issues.

This

essay will examine the reasons behind

this

tendency and how it can affect individuals in the long run. The main problem,

that is

behind the recent growth in the percentage of overweight children in

the

Correct article usage

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western society, is the change in our lifestyles. Nowadays many people work in front of computers in their offices.

Therefore

, adults, who actually work in those conditions, tend to raise their infants the same way, since they get used to living without any activities.

Nevertheless

, not many people realize, that little ones require much more physical activities than adults because they are growing individuals, who have a lot of energy.

For instance

, if a child does not have the opportunity to do some physical activities

together with

his family, he is only going to watch

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, or sit on the sofa the whole day and eat, so he would not get bored. The mentioned causes

also

have an impact on the little ones

well

Rephrase

apply

show examples

being

Verb problem

well-being

show examples

. The foremost effect is seen on the cardiovascular system which can turn into life-threatening situations, like cardiac arrest. The other possible repercussion is diabetes, which can

also

burden the life of a child and in the long run, can cause organ failure. Either way, it is obvious that problems concerning

weight

can shorten one’s life span and pose a threat of early death. All in all, it is important to follow your

weight

, keep a healthy diet, and maintain a physically active lifestyle, because the consequences can be cruel. But even if a person notices some problems with his

weight

, he should seek help from a professional, because not always it is just because of an unhealthy lifestyle.

Submitted by oimigle on Tue Nov 29 2022

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task response

Your essay presents a clear and comprehensive response to the task. It effectively discusses the causes and effects of the increasing percentage of overweight children in Western society. You've provided relevant and specific examples to support your points, which helps to illustrate the key ideas.

coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates a logical structure, with a clear introduction and conclusion. The main points are well-supported and effectively linked throughout the essay. Additionally, the essay maintains coherence and cohesion through the use of transitions and linking words, which enhances the overall organization of the text.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

321 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

overweight
obesity
caloric intake
sedentary lifestyle
screen time
physical education
nutritious
psychological well-being
self-esteem
socioeconomic
healthcare system
life expectancy
obesity-related complications

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The percentage of overweight children in the western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years.Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation , such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people prefer to live in a house, while others feel that there are more advantages to living in an apartment. Are there more advantages than disavdantages to living in a house compared with living in an apaartment?

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people think that money spent on protecting wild animals would be better than spending on improving the lives of the human population. To what extent do you agree or disagree?