IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

social media is becoming increasingly popular among all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media does have risks. Do the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

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In recent years, social
media
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 is getting to know with a high pace among teenagers, adults and elders. In spite of its popularity, some
people
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 believe that releasing personal
information
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 on
this
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 platform put
such
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data
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 in danger. In my opinion, the pros of using social
media
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 outweigh the cons. We take a look at both sides of
this
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 idea as follows: On the one hand, because users put their achievements
such
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 as essays, job prosperities, training courses etc on these websites, others can easily find and learn about kind of subjects and pursue the path of
such
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people
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.
This
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 is not to say that, there are many
data
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 centres to search and find
information
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 but,
this
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 platform provides a unit and full source of knowledge and experiments for users to make use of.
Moreover
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, there are lots of successful
people
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 who Never heard about them. Hopefully, through social
media
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, these
people
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 along with well-known
people
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 take a chance to share their achievements and become famous and earn money in their field.
In addition
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, social
media
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 bring academic and professional opportunities for
people
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 as there are a large number of users who are highly-educated professors or well-skilled businessmen from all around the world.
For example
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, employers find their required workforces
accordingly
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 by accessing their profiles. These benefits cease for
people
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 throughout the world to interact and gain
information
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.
Conversely
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, owning hackers, the possibility of accessing personal
data
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 is high.
Finally
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,
although
Linking Words
, the privacy of using social
media
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 is under threat, by following some guidelines we can decrease
such
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 risks. To sum up, it seems that social
media
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 provide a favourable environment for
people
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 to be known, share
data
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 and experiences and lessening involving risks by increasing their level of
information
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 about safety. So the plus points of social
media
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 outweigh the negative points.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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