IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

#countries #people #work #travel #year #school #university #studies
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Some people said that it is good for young people to
work
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 or
travel
Use synonyms
 for a
year
Use synonyms
 between finishing high school and starting university studies. Here is my opinion.
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On
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One
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On
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 the one hand,
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work
Wrong verb form
working
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 or
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travel
Wrong verb form
travelling
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 for
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year
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a year
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between
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after
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 finishing high school can improve the
ability
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 to social life. Nowadays children are often spoilt,
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 means that children grow up without consideration for others and without
understanding
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an understanding
the understanding
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 of where their life standards come from. Working for a
year
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 may let them know how hard the
work
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 is and how lucky they live in
this
Linking Words
Correct your spelling
situation
situaction
Correct your spelling
situation
 right now. It can
also
Linking Words
 improve the
ability
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of working
Replace the preposition
to work
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 in
the
Correct article usage
a
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 group,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is a very important
ability
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 when they get into
the
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apply
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university. While about
travel
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, it can
makes
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make
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they
Correct pronoun usage
them
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 relaxed and improve the
ability
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of talking
Replace the preposition
to talk
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 with
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people they never meet before and knowing the different couture in
different
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a different
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 country.
Correct your spelling
On
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One
Correct your spelling
On
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 the other hand,
work
Use synonyms
 or
travel
Use synonyms
 for a
year
Use synonyms
 may let them forget the feeling of
Correct your spelling
studying
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
. It may
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
 them can not find their groove when they
getting
Wrong verb form
get
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in to
Join the words
into
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 the university. All in all, every coin has two
side
Change to a plural noun
sides
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.You can
decided
Change the verb form
decide
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 with your parents.
Submitted by melindaguan0704 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Life experience
  • Work ethic
  • Career readiness
  • Self-discovery
  • Delayed gratification
  • Intellectual stagnation
  • Financial implications
  • Social dynamics
  • Academic trajectory
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