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Band 7

In some countries, school are open till late so that children can be looked after when parents are at work. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages

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In the present day, most families have
parents
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 who are full-
time
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 workers. In some nations, schools are operating at extended
hours
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 so that
children
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 can be taken care of when their
parents
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 are at
work
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.
This
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 essay will explore both, the advantages and the disadvantages of
this
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 aspect.
To begin
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 with, nowadays
parents
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 are mostly occupied with their jobs throughout the day.
This
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 is mainly
due to
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 the competitive nature of the workplace. In today's world, employees are required to perform extremely well to secure well-paying jobs and promotions.
Hence
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, working
parents
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 spend most of their
time
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 at
work
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, striving to provide a high standard of life for their
children
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. The main advantage is that schools that operate longer
hours
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 are able to cater for the needs of these
parents
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 so that their
children
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 can be looked after properly by teachers.
For example
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, teachers usually occupy the
children
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's
time
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 with beneficial activities
such
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 as reading books and playing interactive games.
This
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 will give the
parents
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 peace of mind so that they can focus on their jobs.
On the contrary
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, there are several disadvantages to
children
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 who stay at school till late.
Parents
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 have less
time
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 to interact with their
children
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 and
this
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 will affect the mental and emotional health of their
children
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.
For instance
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, research has shown that parental love and care during the early stages of a child's life are very crucial.
Therefore
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, a lack of bonding
time
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 between
parents
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 and kids can negatively impact their relationships as
children
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 are not able to express their feelings well.
Furthermore
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, it
also
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 creates a burden for teachers as they are required to
work
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 longer
hours
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,
hence
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, they fail to achieve a
work
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-life balance. In conclusion, the extended opening
hours
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 of schools have both benefits and drawbacks to society.
However
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, it is an inevitable scenario as
parents
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 are required to
work
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 longer
hours
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 and school is the best place for a child to be looked after.

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task achievement
Make sure to include specific examples or data to strengthen your points, especially when discussing the impact on children's mental health.
coherence cohesion
Be mindful of language precision and clarity, as this can help convey ideas more effectively.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with a distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
task achievement
You effectively explore both the advantages and disadvantages, providing a balanced view.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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