People are surrounded by advertisement which has an increase effect on our lives. Do you think the positive effect of this outweigh the negative effect?

Nowadays, many
people
have a growing number of commercial things in
our
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
lives. The merits and demerits of both types of
advertisement
will be discussed in
this
essay. In my opinion, On the one hand, a lot of
people
used to see plenty of
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the billboard, on the application and in the games. Thanks to
commercial
Fix the agreement mistake
commercials
show examples
some
people
can
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
know about
this
thing and
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
buy
Correct pronoun usage
itbuy
show examples
. In
this
way, advertising may
making
Change the verb form
make
be making
show examples
income for
Add an article
an advertiser
the advertiser
show examples
advertiser
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisers
show examples
. In a great number of
countries
Add a comma
,countries
show examples
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
give information about
goods
, new foods or
discount
Fix the agreement mistake
discounts
show examples
and humans
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
see
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
goods
and
possible
Change the word
possibly
show examples
to
want
Add the particle
towant
show examples
buy
Correct pronoun usage
thembuy
show examples
.
For example
, In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Astana have
Add an article
an advertisement
show examples
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
fast food and plenty of
people
can not disregard
because
Correct pronoun usage
it because
show examples
for some residents it
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
expensive, but it
is attract
Change the verb form
attracts
show examples
us, because
after
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
we want to buy
this
food.
On the other hand
, the main disadvantage is that sometimes consumers buy these products without understanding what they really need.
This
Change the determiner
These goods
show examples
goods
can make you
frustrating
Replace the word
frustrated
show examples
or it is just wasting money for
Add an article
the thing
show examples
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
show examples
. Sometimes in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advertisement
have a large of number
truck
Fix the agreement mistake
trucks
show examples
and
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these trucks can be
Add an article
a danger
show examples
danger
Replace the word
dangerous
show examples
for
a children
Correct the article-noun agreement
children
a child
show examples
may
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
see and copy, because they think that it is cool for them.
Moreover
, some
commercial
Fix the agreement mistake
commercials
show examples
may promote bad
goods
for
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
,
for example
, cigarettes or
beers
Fix the agreement mistake
beer
show examples
, it is very harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
us. In conclusion, No doubt that
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
outweigh
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
. Because thanks to commercial billboards we can know about any product and choose
.
Change preposition
from.
show examples
there are certain drawbacks of adverts,
I
Correct word choice
but I
show examples
still consider their impact on society to be positive on the whole.
Submitted by Allazhar on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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