IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#governments #progress #people #country
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Despite it varies
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country
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from country
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 to
country
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, some governments feel that their main vision is the economic enhancement of the
country
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.
However
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, I strongly agree with those who believe that the governments should be focused on other
sectors
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such
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 as
,
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apply
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health
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, and
Education
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. On the one hand, those who support
the
Correct article usage
apply
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financial improvement say that the progress of the
economy
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 plays an important role in individuals' life that could be beneficial for them in several ways. If a
country
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 concentrates properly to thrive
the
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in the
show examples
 financial
sectors
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, they develop
infrasturctues
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infrastructures
infrastructure
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throughout
through
thought
throught
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throughout
 the
country
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 to enrich the road networks, and they could be able to receive
the
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apply
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foreign investments.
For Example
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, a report has been published in the daily newspaper a couple of months ago that China has been investing
into
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in
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 those countries which are progressing steadily in the economic arenas in the
last
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 ten years.
Furthermore
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, the living standards of a nation
increases
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increase
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 dramatically when the governments focus on the enhancement of
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economy
Correct article usage
the economy
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.
Consequently
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, the rate of
the
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apply
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poverty could be declined day by day.
On the other hand
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, in my opinion, the progress of
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education
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the education
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 and
health
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sectors
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ensure
Correct subject-verb agreement
ensures
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 the fundamental rights of the citizens
,
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apply
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 and make them independent from all perspectives. A quality
education
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 system might be provided
an
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with an
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 educated nation, and it brings overseas’ people to study in a
country
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 which
enhance
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enhances
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 the
economy
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.
For instance
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, recently a study has shown that international students have contributed a huge amount of money
into
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to
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 the United Kingdom’s
economy
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 by paying their
tuitions
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tuition
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 in the year 2020, while other
sectors
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 had
least
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the least
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 contribution
for
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to
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 epidemics of Covid-19.
In addition
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, by improving
health
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 industries, the
Correct your spelling
government
governments
goverments
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government
 can make strong the
economy
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 eloquently.
Therefore
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, people will not be visited other countries for better treatment, and they will be spent the money in their home
country
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 which they budgeted for abroad. In Conclusion,
although
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 economic progress has many advantages undoubtedly,
however
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, I firmly believe that the
health
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 and
education
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sectors
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 should be prioritized more than others.
Submitted by ataul.mumit on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • sustainable development
  • social equality
  • environmental degradation
  • cultural heritage
  • technological innovation
  • wealth disparity
  • human development index
  • holistic approach
  • quality of life
  • economic prosperity
  • healthcare system
  • education system
  • cultural diversity
  • policy decisions
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