IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Many people believe that it is easier to have a healthy lifestyles in the countryside. other believe that there are health benefits of living in cities. discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #lifestyles #countryside #health #cities
Although
 some put forward the view that having healthier life is possible in the metropolises, I am of the opinion that there
is
Change the verb form
are
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 more advantages in case of the health
for
Change preposition
of
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 those individuals living in the villages. It is said that well-being of the society in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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large cities is better.
That is
 to say, the metropolis has more options and needed methods to cure
the
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apply
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diseases.
For instance
, remedies are more available to citizens in comparison with those who live out of
the
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apply
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town and when you have
life-
Correct article usage
a life-threating
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threating
Correct your spelling
threatening
situation
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situations
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such
 as
heart
Correct article usage
a heart
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 attack or panic attack the member of the family can easily and constantly find a pharmacy in close proximity to their homeplace and tackle
this
 problem.
That is
 why
,
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apply
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 people in the city keep themselves safe and prevent even
the
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apply
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fatal outcome. I,
however
, would claim that to have
healthy
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a healthy
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 lifestyle for those who live in the villages is
increadibly
Correct your spelling
incredibly
 uncomplicated. What I mean is,
Correct article usage
the community
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community
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communities
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 in
the
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apply
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large cities
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 facing
torubles
Correct your spelling
troubles
trouble
 with their
Correct your spelling
mental
menthal
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mental
 health. In Almaty,
for example
,
on
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one
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 of the major problems is traffic
congestions
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congestion
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 which
cause
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causes
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 a great amount of people headaches and stress, and the rate
for
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of
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the
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apply
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anxiety is
visiuably
Correct your spelling
visibly
visually
 higher in the urban zones than in the residential areas.
As a result
, it is peaceful and much
relaxed
Correct quantifier usage
more relaxed
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 to have
the
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a
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 home far away from
the
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apply
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Correct your spelling
industrialized
industrialised
industirialized
Correct your spelling
industrialised
 places. In conclusion, despite the fact that some find more pros for the well-being in the big cities due to the ease of the
selfcare
Correct your spelling
self-care
self care
, I would maintain that residing in the villages is way more attractive and preferable in order to be more positive and stable every day.
Submitted by diana on

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