IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The car is possibly the most convenient and popular way of getting from A to B. However, due to its impact on environment and the risk it poses to pedestrians and motorists, government should take urgent steps to reduce our dependency on this mode of transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In today's world, individuals prefer using their car to commute rather than public means of
transportation
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. Some believe that we are too dependent on them and because of their environmental and safety issues actions should be taken by the law.
however
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,
cars
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 are an essential part of the
transportation
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 system, it has made some issues and people should be encouraged by the government to use their private
vehicles
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 less frequently. On the
one
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 hand,
one
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 of the main detrimental effects of
cars
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 on the environment is the huge amount of CO2 production and it can be solved by using electric
vehicles
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 or public
transportation
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. Exhaust fumes from
vehicles
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 that contain a lot of toxic gasses are released into the atmosphere.
Therefore
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, global warming and higher levels of the sea can be caused by CO2 which is
one
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 of those gases.
On the other hand
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, the numerous
cars
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 commuting at high speeds can lead to a higher rate of accidents, especially the ones in which walking people and motorcyclists are involved.
As a result
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, walking people not sitting in cabins surrounded by airbags are the ones injured.
Firstly
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, To tackle
this
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 environmental man-made disaster made by
cars
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, the government could have put some taxes on fossil fuels and increased prices. Authorities can invest
this
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 money in companies
such
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 as tesla which produces electric
vehicles
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.
In addition
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, expanding public transport can be a way to encourage individuals to use public
transportation
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.
secondly
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, In order to boost the safety of the unprotected public, guardrails and footbridges can be installed in streets.
Also
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, lowering the maximum speed allowed is
one
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 the other field in which law intervention is needed. To conclude, I believe
Although
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 there have been a lot of problems caused by private
transportation
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, they can not be eliminated completely but there are some solutions that government can reduce the consequences.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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