It is important for people to take risks, both in their personal lives and professional lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweigh the disadvantages.

Taking

risks

consider an equitable equation to reach a high level from all aspects. It is substantial for individuals to gamble, in both two their occupational and personal lives.

This

essay will show one benefit and one drawback in terms of achieving goals and a big loss. On one hand of

this

issue, taking

risks

could improve people's knowledge significantly.

This

mean

Change the verb form

means

show examples

, that professional life will develop skills in order to prepare a plan to achieve aims swiftly.

For example

, a man who has no experience as a leader but accepts to be a leader, for a long period of time his leadership skill will be improved.

As a result

this

, people should take

risks

and live through many circumstances to acquire valuable views owing to future wise decisions. On another hand of

this

issue, the drawback can take a place obviously through that. To clear

this

, a big loss like an occupation might make the individual who goes through it frustrated, while through personal lives could be ending some relationships in order to hasty decisions.

For instance

, parents who do not save an amount

Change preposition

apply

show examples

money for

a critical situations

Correct the article-noun agreement

critical situations

a critical situation

show examples

, their kids may get sick and die because the parents do not have enough money.

Therefore

, the obvious of taking

risks

is getting filed because of do not review our decisions when

take

Change the verb form

taking

show examples

an unexpected situations

Correct the article-noun agreement

unexpected situations

an unexpected situation

show examples

. To summarize, it might be not possible to cover all aspects of

this

issue.

However

this

essay focus only on achieving goals and a big loss. The most important points that have been mentioned are taking

risks

in some situations considering improvement and the obvious of taking

risks

is getting failed.

Finally

, it can be said that as benefits

Change preposition

show examples

taking

risks

as well as drawbacks at the same level, so we have to experiment with many things in our life to learn,

however

, at the same time we have to be careful.

Submitted by ghidaali1996 on Thu Dec 08 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

322 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their personal lives and professional lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweigh the disadvantages.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional food and traditional ways of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some parents say that they should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Smoking not only harms the smoker, but also people nearby. Therefore, smoking should be banned in public places. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

These days, many countries show interest in space exploration. What are the advantages and disadvantages of space exploration?