Television has had a significant influence on the culture of many societies. to what extent would you say that television has positively or negatively affected the cultural development of your society?

#television #influence #culture #societies #development #society

Nowadays, due to the improvement of technology, more and more useful and creative electronic devices were invented,

for

example

Add the comma(s)

,example

show examples

the invention of television.

However

, some

people

claimed that because of

this

invention, there are some drawbacks

affect

Correct pronoun usage

that affect

show examples

our cultural

developments

Fix the agreement mistake

development

show examples

. In my opinion, I believe that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

has more positive

effectives

Correct your spelling

effective

effects

than negative ones. It is often argued that watching

is an activity that causes

people

to get

addiction

Replace the word

addicted

show examples

. The reason is that

this

leisure activity can really let

people

escape from the

reality

Replace the word

real

show examples

world not only

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

children but

also

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

adults. Whereas,

this

situation will increase the antisocial and isolated problems. The whole society may be influenced by

this

because the

inhabitats

Correct your spelling

inhabitants

are more likely to spend

time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

watching programs or playing switch on

instead

of communicating with their

neighbors

Change the spelling

neighbours

show examples

Besides

, the program

Change preposition

show examples

Add an article

the TV

show examples

sometimes will

Add a missing verb

be too

show examples

too

Replace the word

show examples

violence

Replace the word

violent

show examples

unappropriate

Correct your spelling

inappropriate

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for children. If parents don't pay attention,

then

the kids might imitate the bad

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

which they saw on

. Despite these negative effects, there are still many

people

benefit

Correct pronoun usage

who benefit

show examples

from

this

creation.

First

, they can gain worldwide and various

knowledges

Fix the agreement mistake

knowledge

show examples

by watching

news

Add an article

the news

show examples

or many kinds of

programs.

Change preposition

Through

show examples

this

, we can easily achieve new things in

Add an article

a more

show examples

interesting way

instead

of reading in the library boringly.

Moreover

, it can help

people

to release their stress. Because of the heavy work and economic stress, more and more workers feel unhappy and

stressful

Replace the word

stressed

show examples

. But after work, they can share

time

with their family by watching some movies or cartoons together. Overall, television is really convenient and is a good product for

people

to use during their leisure

time

. In conclusion, the invention of

is a

two-side

Correct your spelling

two-sided

show examples

sword.

However

, I think there are more benefits and positive effects than

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

negative sides as long as we should not watch it all the

time

Submitted by tracy19978688 on Fri Dec 09 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

312 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Television has had a significant influence on the culture of many societies. to what extent would you say that television has positively or negatively affected the cultural development of your society?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

Some people think we need to give aid to all poor countries. Others, however, argue that we should not give international aid to countries with corruption in their system. Discuss both views and provide your own opinion.

in many countries’ schools have severe problems with student behavior. What do you think are the cause (problems)of this? What solutions can you suggest?

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?