Some people say that adversiting is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Nowadays, advertising has a significant role in our daily life which leads to some people believing it can cause the public to buy things.

While

Linking Words

others are

in contrast

Linking Words

, they agree on

this

Linking Words

, that it is a useless way to persuade people to buy things.

To begin

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with, on many occasions, trusting someone can lead us to do whatever they suggest as we think they want best for us or something turned out well for them so, it will be good enough for us as well.

Therefore

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, as there are some communities that are famous on social media we can expect them to be great influencers. As an illustration, in Iran, Instagram has become a wonderful place for popular ones to advertise products and gain money as they have many followers and

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

trusted.

In addition

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, needless to say, seeing sites offering trials can motivate curiosity, as we want to give the app a try and figure out whether it is useful or not and without even wanting to consume a thing by using those trials we may be thrilled to. To exemplify, some applications

such

Linking Words

as Picsart offer you a

7 days

Correct your spelling

7-day

free consumption and it can be an opportunity for anyone who is concerned.

However

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, using

this

Linking Words

method can be exhausting for some generations especially, older ones, hearing the same audio and video repeatedly can be annoying in some circumstances ,

therefore

Linking Words

, has the opposite effect as whenever the public sees those advertisements

instead

Linking Words

willing

Add a missing verb

being willing

show examples

to buy rather take alternatives ways.

For example

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, there are bad acts in any films or tuning sounds

thus

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, some may hear or watch those parts and promise themselves not to go even near those products

as a result

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of bad directing. In conclusion, I consider,

this

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method

Wrong verb form

to be

show examples

beneficial as watching those advertisements on television or social media can boost our curiosity and lead to a few changes .

Also

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, trusting someone is a great deal,

therefore

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influencers have a vital role in persuading us.

Submitted by meli_kh3000 on Fri Dec 09 2022

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Content

The essay attempts to cover both sides of the argument but is slightly biased towards the opinion that advertising is effective. Fair development and support of ideas but examples could be explained better to fully enhance the argument

Grammar

The essay has minor grammatical errors and incorrect word usage which could be improved.

Sentence Structure

Several sentences are structured awkwardly, such as 'While others are in contrast, they agree on this, that it is a useless way to persuade people to buy things.' This awkward phrasing detracts from the overall clarity of the essay.

Tone

The use of occasional informal language (e.g 'giving the app a try', 'tuning sounds') detracts from the formal tone typically expected in IELTS academic essays.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

333 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

persuade
promote
attract
influence
impact
consumerism
commercialism
market
product
brand
endorsement
manipulative
saturated
overwhelmed
repetitive
distracting
irrelevant
exaggerated
misleading
desensitized

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Some people say that adversiting is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?

Some people believe that the environmental impacts of air transport outweigh its benefits in food importation. To what extent do you agree? Provide reasons for your answer and include relevant examples.

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is becoming increasingly popular for school leavers to take a year off (a gap year) before going to university. Do the advantages of this outweigh any disadvantages?

Topic 2: Some peole think the government should focus on improving the economy of the country. Other people think that government should focus on social services such as health and education programs. Which statement do you agree with? Explain and provide examples to support your opinion.