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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

A company is going to give some money either to support the arts or to protect the environment . Which do you think the company should choose ?use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

#company #money #support #arts #environment
A colossal corporation is contributing some
money
 as charity either to aid the artwork or to defend
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature
 . In my view defending
nature
 is the most dominant thing for society because it has a lot of effects
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
 . I will put my thoughts into words in forthcoming paragraphs . Some people point out that the firm should give
money
 as
Add an article
a donation
show examples
donation
Fix the agreement mistake
donations
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 in order to develop
artworks
Fix the agreement mistake
artwork
show examples
. Because progressing art is the most cardinal aspect for
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
. especially our national music instruments or music
express
Correct pronoun usage
that express
show examples
 our culture and
traditional
Replace the word
traditions
show examples
.They have been part of our history For a long time.
For example
 dutar ,
gijjak
Correct your spelling
Najjar
, chaykoviz or horn else applicable to
Add an article
the song
a song
show examples
song
Fix the agreement mistake
songs
show examples
for instance
 makam
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
contains different marvellous sounds as well as folk music . So they should be come on worldwide by various
assotsattion
Correct your spelling
association
.
Furthermore
Add a comma
,
show examples
various nations of the world ought to enjoy them .
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 majority of people as well as I claim that we must stand up for
nature
 because our environment
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 being polluted by mankind. It means people always produce various trashes
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
nature
 . It contains different plastic bags , plastic products as well as
syntethic
Correct your spelling
synthetic
 materials . It results
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
pollution
Correct article usage
the pollution
show examples
 of our world .
As a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
 it has been
global
Correct article usage
a global
show examples
 complication among all countries .
Such
 as all landfills are full of
garbages
Correct subject-verb agreement
garbage
show examples
. Our earth has been in danger
connect
Wrong verb form
connected
show examples
 to global boiling .reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
All
probl
Correct your spelling
problems
.ems relevant to environmental pollution . So if we restore plastic rubbish , contaminating ecology will reduce by that strategy . So we have to set up companies that
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
rebuild
trashes
Change the verb form
trash
show examples
.
Eventually
Add a comma
,Eventually
show examples
 they will require
colossal
Add an article
a colossal
show examples
 amount of
money
 . So
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 my mind all companies that
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are going to give some
money
 as charity ,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
 can divorce some
money
 to save
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
instead
 of supporting art . To conclude : all firms must divorce
money
 from their fund in order to secure our
nature
 that they are going to
separating
Wrong verb form
separate
show examples
money
 as
Add an article
a contribution
show examples
contribution
Fix the agreement mistake
contributions
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 for anything . I feel that the most alternative
desicion
Correct your spelling
decision
 is separating
money
to
Change preposition
from
show examples
 our environment from their budget because
it's
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
 outcome enormously plays
Add an article
the
show examples
role of
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • corporate social responsibility (CSR)
  • renewable energy
  • conservation
  • Green jobs
  • innovation
  • cultural enrichment
  • brand differentiation
  • public health
  • climate change
  • societal impact
  • operational costs
  • community engagement
  • habitat preservation
  • carbon footprint
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