Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?
In today's society, the majority believe that being rich is the key to
stay
happy. In fact, finances provide you Wrong verb form
staying
more
opportunities and Change preposition
with more
comfortable
lifestyle Correct article usage
a comfortable
Linking Words
On
the other hand, we have more Add the comma(s)
,On
value
things that make Replace the word
valuable
you
happier, it is close Correct pronoun usage
us
people
, namely Change preposition
to people
your
family and friends.
It is obvious, at present you can't survive without a strong cash flow. Correct pronoun usage
our
Linking Words
Consequently
to live comfortably, all you need is to have a rigid income. If you are financially stable you can easily afford a luxurious life and it is so uncomplicated to achieve your targets too. Add a comma
,Consequently
For instance
, if you are wealthy enough, Linking Words
then
you can purchase a villa close to the beach or on a private island which makes you extremely satisfied and happy for the entire lifetime by treating yourself as a king with a load of joyful activities that you could do.
Linking Words
However
, even though you are a billionaire, there are some other facts that you can't afford by paying cash. Being rich might not be a help if you suffer from an incurable disease and it will lead to becoming miserable. Linking Words
Furthermore
, there are a lot of situations in which money cannot make you live like a perfect person. Linking Words
For example
, Linking Words
although
you bought a castle or villa and if you do not have a family or a close set of friends to share your thoughts or happinessLinking Words
, you
will feel alone and your life becomes so monotonous Change preposition
with, you
and
Correct word choice
apply
also
Linking Words
the
being not mentally stable will not add glow to your soul. SoCorrect article usage
apply
that
, it is necessary to think about a balance between physical and mental Correct determiner usage
apply
healthiness
.
To conclude, it is acceptable that being a rich person can lead to having a luxurious life. But there are many more other reasons, which we should not forget, especially the spiritual and psychological facts to make a person so joyful and delighted.Replace the word
health
Submitted by Allazhar on
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