After graduating from high school, some young people decide to start working right away instead of going to the university. What are the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this?

#school #people #right #university

It is claimed that some

youngesters

Correct your spelling

youngsters

land a

job

after graduating high school rather than taking admission to

the

Correct article usage

show examples

college or university. In the following

paragraphs

Add a comma

,paragraphs

show examples

merits and demerits of

this

phenomenon will be assessed

To begin

with , commencing to work from their earlier ages , adults can get many benefits.

Firstly

, they are able to supply their needs by earning their living wages . They

are not only enable

Change the verb form

are not only enabled

show examples

satisfying

Wrong verb form

satisfy

show examples

their needs , but they

also

can support their parents financially along with

Add an article

the

show examples

sense of independence .

Secondly

, they could gain

job

experiences and practices

in particular

fields having nurtured their certain

skills

For example

, working as a shop assistant , adolescents interact with different people and count

total

Correct article usage

the total

show examples

prices of purchases and they might enhance their communication

skills

alongside

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

numerical

skills

Although

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

practical

knowledge

can be gained quickly, theoretical

knowledge

is an integral part of work and life which might lead to good

job

prospects in the foreseeable future. By going to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

higher education, most

youngesters

Correct your spelling

youngsters

first

assimilate theoretical

knowledge

, which

incorporated

Add a missing verb

is incorporated

show examples

into a subject syllabus , by guided learning which creates substantial fundament to their practical

skills

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

other words, they might be more able to accomplish their task for the

first

without trial and error.

Furthermore

, it is common

Add the particle

to know

show examples

know

Replace the word

knowledge

show examples

that people who have

Correct article usage

a bachelor

show examples

bachelor

Change noun form

bachelor's

show examples

degree

Fix the agreement mistake

degrees

show examples

have more

job

prospects than somebody who graduated

secondary

Change preposition

from secondary

show examples

school . In many

organization

Fix the agreement mistake

organizations

show examples

and

companies

Add a comma

,companies

show examples

employees want to hire

well qualified

Add a hyphen

well-qualified

show examples

workers . Because many of them consider these workers

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a experts

Correct the article-noun agreement

an expert

experts

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

their area . It is evident that they studied hard and many years to get their degrees. To recapitulate, while working

Change preposition

show examples

earlier ages may lead to good living conditions with

plethora

Add an article

a plethora

the plethora

show examples

of experience and practice , there might be

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

Correct your spelling

theoretical

therotical

Correct your spelling

theoretical

knowledge

and less potential

Change preposition

for

show examples

promotion

Submitted by sevinchazimova11 on Mon Dec 12 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

313 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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After graduating from high school, some young people decide to start working right away instead of going to the university. What are the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

People in the 21st century have a better quality of life than the previous centuries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The uses of violence in music lyric, video games and films seen by children is causing concern in many societies. What problems may be caused by this type of violent imagery, and what steps could be taken to lessen the impact on young people?

Some people think that older school children should learn a wide range of subjects and develop knowledge. Others think that they should only study a small number of subjects in details. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. T

Many developed countries are giving financial aid to poor countries. However, this hasn’t solved the problem of poverty in these nations and so other types of help are needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?