Some people think that children should aim to their best at what they are doing while others believe it is not necessary for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #aim

Nowadays, technology has spread in the world. So, these days

children

have internet excess and mobile phones which they search on google and decide their goals.

Children

work

on their dream since schooling. Some

people

argued that it is created to depressed early.

Therefore

, it is not necessary for them. I will discuss both these points of view and give my opinion in the ensuing paragraphs. On the one hand, some

people

think that it is best to age to decide their

aim

because they know how would struggle in the upcoming years. The schooling days are a golden day because they do not have responsibilities for

work

, families and others. So,

children

set their

aim

and they

work

hard for their dream. If

children

were to

aim

to become millionaires, they would

work

hard and in the near ,future they will be businessmen.

On the other hand

, today's education system is too critical.

As a result

children

do not have

time

to do leisure activities.

This

system becomes stressful for the student.

Moreover

, everyone thinks that education is too important rather than practical knowledge but it is not true. Books knowledge brings limit for a child. These days, the school curriculum depends on books rather than

one

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

practical

Correct pronoun usage

onespractical

show examples

Hence

children

do not have

time

to do outdoor activities and they become stressed. Stress invites health issues

such

as obesity, sugar level and heart problem at a younger age.

For example

, the survey of Haward university that disses become stress life and in recent times has increased in adult

people

. In conclusion, If achieve the goal, everyone does hard

work

. It is easy for those

people

to decide their

aim

in schooling because in the decision

time

they should not waste

time

determining their goal. For

this

,reason my opinion is with the fore more point of view.

Submitted by jeetkacha13 on Mon Dec 12 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

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Sentence 2 - Example
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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

308 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Topic Vocabulary:

striving for excellence
discipline
perseverance
competitive
reduces pressure
balanced development
fosters creativity
realistic goals
adverse mental health outcomes
achievable aspirations
balanced approach
participation
enjoyment
societal and cultural impact
understanding of success

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Some people think that children should aim to their best at what they are doing while others believe it is not necessary for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

In the future, the main reason for going to shopping mall will be for entertainment, not to shop. do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try cooporate more rather that competing against each other. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say it is important to keep your home and work place tidy with everything organized and in the correct places. What is your opinion about it?