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Some people think that children should aim to their best at what they are doing while others believe it is not necessary for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #aim
Nowadays, technology has spread in the world. So, these days
children
 have internet excess and mobile phones which they search on google and decide their goals.
Children
work
 on their dream since schooling. Some
people
 argued that it is created to depressed early.
Therefore
, it is not necessary for them. I will discuss both these points of view and give my opinion in the ensuing paragraphs. On the one hand, some
people
 think that it is best to age to decide their
aim
 because they know how would struggle in the upcoming years. The schooling days are a golden day because they do not have responsibilities for
work
, families and others. So,
children
 set their
aim
 and they
work
 hard for their dream. If
children
 were to
aim
 to become millionaires, they would
work
 hard and in the near ,future they will be businessmen.
On the other hand
, today's education system is too critical.
As a result
,
children
 do not have
time
 to do leisure activities.
This
 system becomes stressful for the student.
Moreover
, everyone thinks that education is too important rather than practical knowledge but it is not true. Books knowledge brings limit for a child. These days, the school curriculum depends on books rather than
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
practical
Correct pronoun usage
onespractical
show examples
.
Hence
,
children
 do not have
time
 to do outdoor activities and they become stressed. Stress invites health issues
such
 as obesity, sugar level and heart problem at a younger age.
For example
, the survey of Haward university that disses become stress life and in recent times has increased in adult
people
. In conclusion, If achieve the goal, everyone does hard
work
. It is easy for those
people
 to decide their
aim
 in schooling because in the decision
time
 they should not waste
time
 determining their goal. For
this
 ,reason my opinion is with the fore more point of view.
Submitted by jeetkacha13 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • striving for excellence
  • discipline
  • perseverance
  • competitive
  • reduces pressure
  • balanced development
  • fosters creativity
  • realistic goals
  • adverse mental health outcomes
  • achievable aspirations
  • balanced approach
  • participation
  • enjoyment
  • societal and cultural impact
  • understanding of success
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