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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Using a computer every day can have more negative than postive effects on young children. Do you agree or disagree?

#computer #postive #effects #children
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It is important to say that nowadays
computers
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 have become essential in society.
Hence
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 some young
children
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 are geeks with
computers
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 but they really need them for homework or digital classes. Personally , I believe that
computers
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 could bring negative effects on young people because they spent a lot of time in front of
computers
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. I feel
this
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 way for two main reasons, which ai will explore in the following essay.
Firstly
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, When
children
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 arrive at their houses don't spend with their parents and they want to play their games on a computer and they start to lose social skills with other
children
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 ,
this
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 trend is common now in society .
Thus
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, young people can develop mental issues and acquire bad words from their partners or parents.
For instance
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 , In China de government doesn't allow
children
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 less than 12 years don't play daily any more than 1 hour.
Secondly
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, Parents have an obligation a supervise their
children
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 when they
use
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 the
computers
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 or they can put in the
computers
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 a spy app where they can know how their
children
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 are using all technologies.
Accordingly
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, the
use
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 of
every day
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everyday
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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computers
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 for
children
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 can bring negative effects on their eyes producing
a
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apply
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huge damage in the future to
tohave
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the
use
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 glasses.
For example
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, youths are exposed
bloody
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to bloody
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 games that might impact them. In conclusion, I strongly believe that all of us are living in a new era where is necessary to
use
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computers
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 for our skills but we should protect our youths especially when are exposed to games and
computers
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.
Submitted by rulalolo37 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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