Using a computer every day can have more negative than postive effects on young children. Do you agree or disagree?

It is important to say that nowadays
computers
have become essential in society.
Hence
some young
children
are geeks with
computers
but they really need them for homework or digital classes. Personally , I believe that
computers
could bring negative effects on young people because they spent a lot of time in front of
computers
. I feel
this
way for two main reasons, which ai will explore in the following essay.
Firstly
, When
children
arrive at their houses don't spend with their parents and they want to play their games on a computer and they start to lose social skills with other
children
,
this
trend is common now in society .
Thus
, young people can develop mental issues and acquire bad words from their partners or parents.
For instance
, In China de government doesn't allow
children
less than 12 years don't play daily any more than 1 hour.
Secondly
, Parents have an obligation a supervise their
children
when they
use
the
computers
or they can put in the
computers
a spy app where they can know how their
children
are using all technologies.
Accordingly
, the
use
of
every day
Correct your spelling
everyday
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
computers
for
children
can bring negative effects on their eyes producing
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
huge damage in the future to
tohave
Correct your spelling
the
use
glasses.
For example
, youths are exposed
bloody
Change preposition
to bloody
show examples
games that might impact them. In conclusion, I strongly believe that all of us are living in a new era where is necessary to
use
computers
for our skills but we should protect our youths especially when are exposed to games and
computers
.
Submitted by rulalolo37 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: