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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Stress is now a major problem in many countries around the world. What are some of the factors in modern society that cause stress, and how can we reduce it?

#stress #countries #world #factors #society
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These days ,
people
 usually have a
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
show examples
 stress in their own lives because they are often worried about their job , family and health.
However
, when they can distract themselves from their bad thoughts by practising the activities they like, they seem to be very happy and satisfied. To elaborate, nowadays, since a large number of
people
 want to have a higher life quality, they might work for many hours in their workplace due to the fact that they have a great interest in getting the best position and a better salary in the company they are part of in a few years . The women who do their profession in a hospital or another place, in case they have one or more children ,
admittedy
Correct your spelling
admittedly
admitted
, they
also
 need to spend time looking after and playing with their kids .
Besides
this
, those who suffer from a serious illness that can be ,
for example
,
a
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apply
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cancer or a chronic disease are probably exhausted
about
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from
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 the continuous therapies their doctors suggest
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
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to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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do.
However
 , many
people
also
 try to distract themselves from their worries by doing funny activities. Many of them usually practice any sport they like in the sports centres that are
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
 too far from
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 houses they live in. Indeed, my young sister usually goes swimming in a pool two or three days a week especially in the evening after she finishes working and comes back home whereas her boyfriend frequently has a long walk in the mountains with her or his friends who have
his
Change the word
the
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 same passion. In conclusion , I personally think that if
people
 really listened to their true needs ,
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 would learn to find the best way they can distract themselves from the stressful events they daily run into.
Submitted by silviamangioni on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • unemployment
  • financial instability
  • social safety nets
  • constant connectivity
  • work-life balance
  • remote work
  • social isolation
  • community support
  • chronic illnesses
  • affordable healthcare
  • public health campaigns
  • mental well-being
  • high-stakes testing
  • holistic education
  • flexible working hours
What to do next:
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