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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that modern tecchnology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #tecchnology
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In today's modern world, cutting-edge
technology
 plays a crucial role in communication since it allows the community speaks with each other at a long distance.
Moreover
, some
people
 guess that phones and the internet make a person more sociable, while other groups suppose that individuals thanks to
technology
 contact with others lesser. In my opinion, social
media
 makes
people
 less communicative due to the fact that the internet gives
people
 all conveniences which allow them to live at home.
This
 essay will discuss both sides. Despite all benefits of
technology
 in communication, plenty of
people
 do not use them which makes these advantages useless.
Furthermore
, the main reason for
this
 is a multitude of men do not have acquaintances with
who
Change the pronoun
whom
show examples
 they can interact on
theinternet
Correct your spelling
the internet
internet
.
For example
, the Whatsapp application has the function to create huge groups for a lot of
people
,
however
, the
communitydoes
Correct your spelling
community does
not
Change the verb form
do not
did not
show examples
 use it.
Also
, most of these applications can not create new friends for these groups of
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
. Social
media
also
 can cause addiction which brings troubles with personal life. Today, many nations have problems with
this
such
 as children,
instead
 to go and spend time outdoors, waste their free time scrolling social
media
. On top of that, in the future, these kids will not have communicative skills which will be a huge problem for their social life.
For instance
, a multitude of good salary jobs is closely connected with sociable skills which makes
this
 trait crucial. In conclusion, new
technology
 allows
people
 to communicate with friends at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 long distance.
However
, these innovations bring new problems which affect
people
's social life.
Besides
, the community suffers from social
media
 addiction which is popular among kids.
Moreover
, addiction can impact the future lives of many
people
 since most work is closely connected with social skills.
Submitted by Allazhar on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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