IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In your letter describe the situation explain your problems and why it is difficult to work say what kind of accommodation you would prefer You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

#room #college #student #arrangement #work #accommodation #officer #situation #addresses #sir #madam
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Dear Sir or Madam, Greetings of the Day! I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express my dissatisfaction with my current accommodation arrangement at the UC dorm located in the commons building. I am a final year Mechanical Engineering major student and I happen to share room number 601 with a roommate who is studying Arts major. The apartment is a
two bedroom
Add a hyphen
two-bedroom
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 unit which comes with a limitation of
shared
Add an article
a shared
the shared
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 bathroom. My roommate usually has his friends over in the living room during the weekdays as they practice their music or drama in a group.
Moreover
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, he
also
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 organizes parties almost every weekend which usually
continues
Correct subject-verb agreement
continue
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 till midnight. These activities create a lot of disturbance in my bedroom which doesn't allow me to focus on my studies or preparation for job interviews. Parties are
also
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 a nuisance which interrupts
with
Change preposition
apply
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my sleep schedule and doesn't allow me to rest properly.
Furthermore
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, I do not prefer a shared bathroom due to hygiene and cleanliness concerns. I require moving to a different apartment with a
single bedroom
Add a hyphen
single-bedroom
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 unit which should help resolve the problems that I am currently facing. Looking forward to hearing from you! Yours Faithfully, Darshit Nimavat
Submitted by vimzauthority on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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