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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people think that zoos are not good enough for animals and they should be improved or animals must go to natural life. What is your opinion ?

#people #zoos #animals #life
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Most
people
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 believe that today's
zoos
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 are not good enough for wild
animals
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 and they do not meet the demand.
Firstly
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, they can not eat as much as they want and they can not enjoy freedom.
In addition
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,
people
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 do not look after them very well and the conditions created for them are not satisfactory. So
zoos
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 should be developed and
then
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animals
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 can live well. In my opinion,
zoos
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 are not good enough for wildlife. They cannot enjoy
freedom
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the freedom
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 and can not
hunt
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 in the zoo.
For example
Linking Words
, wolves are wild, offensive
animals
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. They
hunt
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 the whole day for looking after their children. In the zoo, they are
serf
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serfs
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,
animals
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 can not
hunt
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 in captivity and they can not forage, so they are forced to eat whatever humans give them. I think, keeping them in captivity is not
right
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the right
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 thing to do because they are alive and keeping them in cages is not good for
people
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 to watch, so I do not visit
zoos
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 at all. Many
people
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 may think that
zoos
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 are better for
animals
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 and it is better to survive in captivity for them than to die quickly in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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wildlife, but I strongly disagree. Because they are restricted from all the activities they want to do, they can neither
hunt
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 nor eat good food, I think. My conclusion is that
people
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 should be kinder to
animals
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 and I am in
favor
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favour
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 of closing
zoos
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 if they do not provide good enough conditions for the
animals
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 there should be released back to their homes, mother nature. I think they must be eager for it.
Submitted by jefnesbit on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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