In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fastfood. It is, therefore, necessary for government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. Do you agree?
In some countries, That citizen is suffering from
the
ailment due to Correct article usage
apply
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
many
fast foods Change preposition
of many
is
increasing day by day, which is Unnecessary verb
apply
concerned
. But I firmly disagree with which governments require to boost a Replace the word
concerns
tax
on this
kind of food
.
First
of all, the
government enhance a Correct word choice
if the
tax
, purchasing fast food
will become a burden for the middle-class
. Correct your spelling
middle class
For instance
, normally, A hamburger has just been on average from $1 to $3, but the higher tax
of about 20%, meaning that consumers are going to have to be an additional payment of $0,20 to $0,60 for every hamburger. From the consumer’s perspective, It is arduous to invest in a hamburger, especially for people who are in a lower condition like students, office workers, postgraduates, unemployed
people. The popular Correct word choice
and unemployed
food
possibly will become overpriced food
which in the difficulty
of middle-class.
To tackle Replace the word
difficult
this
, in my view, the government should provide netizens not
only information about the drawbacks of fast Change preposition
with not
food
but also
its solution. On the other hand
, the government need to have a charter about limiting food
additives such
as sodium, trans fat, and so on which is
the root Correct subject-verb agreement
are
of
Change preposition
apply
the
cause of health issues like diabetes, obesity, Correct article usage
apply
cancer
. Correct word choice
and cancer
This
can go down the bad impact of fast food
on the
health.
In conclusion, the enhancement of higher Correct article usage
apply
tax
does not seem to be a great solution. It is not only become economic pressure on Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
the
Correct article usage
apply
low condition
people but Add a hyphen
low-condition
also
can not deal with the health problems and the amount of consumer
.Fix the agreement mistake
consumers
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite