Gone are the days when children dreamed of becoming doctors and nurses – today’s children want to become YouTubers or vloggers. According to a survey of 1,000 children aged six to 17, more than three quarters of them say they’d consider a career in online videos. It is dangerous for kids to aspire to become a YouTube sensation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It has become highly trending among youngsters to build their full-time career in vlogging,

youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

streaming channels, and other social

media

Use synonyms

platforms as an influencer. Nowadays, when you question a child about their dream jobs, their answers are more inclined towards social

media

Use synonyms

sectors, because of which most people believe that it is risky for the future of the upcoming generation. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I am going to discuss why I partially agree with

this

Linking Words

idea and I am

also

Linking Words

going to present reasons for the other aspects too. With the advancement of technology and mass production, it has become very common to get smart digital devices

such

Linking Words

as smartphones,

i-pads

Correct your spelling

iPads

, computers, cameras, and more. Things started to change when these technologies

are

Wrong verb form

were

show examples

combined with the Internet and social

media

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applications. People are more attracted towards these things rather than mainstream professional alternatives

such

Linking Words

as engineers, doctors, etc. At present, a large number of the

globes

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global

show examples

population is using the Web to upload or watch, audio

as well as

Linking Words

video

content

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and in ,return the

content

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creators get appreciation and financial benefits. If the matter of your videos is beneficial for society as a whole, and you get financial returns by utilizing time and effort

then

Linking Words

it is good to go for it.

For instance

Linking Words

, there are various Youtube channels that

are offering

Wrong verb form

offer

show examples

education services, skill training, and various day-to-day life hacks, for

this

Linking Words

they

also

Linking Words

get money in return as per their views or subscribers. But still, it is advisable not to indulge in these social

media

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things without knowledge, especially at the very start of the career foundation.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, if our young generation considers these platforms as the main source to earn

living

Correct article usage

a living

show examples

then

Linking Words

who is going to take care of other necessary occupational roles? One main reason for

this

Linking Words

inclination is a lack of knowledge, most individuals think, it only requires a phone and internet connection to build a profession via Youtube.

This

Linking Words

is a complete fallacy, there are various factors

such

Linking Words

content

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quality, determination, and service provider's rules and regulations. Another negative thing is the ease

to access

Change preposition

of accessing

show examples

various forms of data irrespective of the age group

such

Linking Words

as 18+

content

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which is bad for minors

as well as

Linking Words

society.

To conclude

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although

Linking Words

, becoming a YouTuber is more popular nowadays, it is advised to focus on more beneficial and stable career options. Apart from that, proper knowledge regarding the uses and benefits of social

media

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should be spread among youngsters by school teachers and guardians.

abdulalishan123

Dec 17, 2022

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task response

Provide clearer and more specific examples related to the topic. Make sure to directly address the prompt argument and state a clear position in your introduction.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that your ideas are logically connected and organized in a clear and cohesive manner. Use transition words to link ideas and maintain a clear flow of information throughout the essay.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

423 words

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