IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

There is an increasing amount of advertising directed at children, which encourages them to buy goods such as toys and snacks. Many parents are that these advertisements put so much pressure on children, while some advertisers claim that they provide useful information to children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#amount #children #goods #toys #snacks #parents #advertisements #pressure #advertisers #information
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In
this
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 modern era,
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advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
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 are the most influential factor in people's life due to advances in technology.
Advertisement
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 is
on
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apply
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everywhere on TV , Websites and so on. Some people harbour a belief that
advertisement
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 companies are majorly targeted
on
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at
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children
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 which directly puts pressure on
children
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, while other people are opposed to
this
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 notion. In
this
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 essay, I will elaborate on the positive and negative aspects of these trends and
thus
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 lead to a logical conclusion. There are myriad
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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reasons to agree with the meritorious side.
The
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apply
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First
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 and Foremost is that most
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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advertisement
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 products provide false
information
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 and target
children
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 to buy the
product
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.
Children
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 tempt
to
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by
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Use synonyms
Add an article
the advertisement
an advertisement
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advertisement
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advertisements
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 and putting enormous pressure on
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the parent
a parent
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parent
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parents
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.
As a result
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, parents brought
a
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apply
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unneccessary
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unnecessary
 things
such
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 as toys,
snack
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snacks
show examples
 and so on for the
children
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 to satisfy their happiness and causes issues to the
children
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's health. From an environmental perspective,
increasing
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an increasing
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 number of the
product
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lead
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leads
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 to
alot
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a lot
lot
 of
wastage
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waste
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resource
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of resource
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.
Hence
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, it's apparent why many are against
to
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apply
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this
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 thread.
On the other hand
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, some advertisers concur that they provide useful
information
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 to
children
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 by considering several facts.
For instance
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, advertising makes aware to
the
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apply
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children
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 about
new
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a new
the new
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product
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products
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 in the market.
Futhermore
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Furthermore
, advertising makes
children
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Add an article
an
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endless variety of free
information
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 about different
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product
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products
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 and learn about
moral
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the moral
a moral
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lesson
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lessons
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.Needless to
says
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say
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, all the points stand in
the
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apply
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good stead. In conclusion, government take severe action
on
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against
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 those companies whose
objecting
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object
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 the false
information
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 to adverse the
product
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 and
to
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apply
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put
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a limitation
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limitation
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limitations
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to
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on
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unhealthy
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the unhealthy
an unhealthy
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product
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products
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. Parents
also
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 take some
responsbility
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responsibility
 and advise the
children
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 impact of buying
unneccessary
Correct your spelling
unnecessary
 and unhealthy
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product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
.
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