IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is the positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#countries #people #products #world #development
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Countries are becoming more and more similar because
people
Use synonyms
 are able to buy the same products anywhere in the
world
Use synonyms
. Do you think
this
Linking Words
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 positive or negative
development
Use synonyms
? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. With the advent of Technology in the travel industry,
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 in air travel
world
Use synonyms
 has become a global village. With
this
Linking Words
 globalisation the trade of almost every type of could has become much
simplar
Correct your spelling
simpler
,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 has led
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to find things in every market of the
world
Use synonyms
 which
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 earlier limited to a specific part of the
world
Use synonyms
. It is
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
argued whether
this
Linking Words
development
Use synonyms
 has
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 positive impact or
negative
Correct article usage
a negative
show examples
 one. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 clearly positive
development
Use synonyms
 both for an individual and a country. For
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
 time
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 were underwear of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
certain technology is that were being used in a limited part of the
world
Use synonyms
.
For
Linking Words
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
 Samsung a technology company that develops and sells most electronic items
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
developed a machine which could clean and wash clothes using ultraviolet rays
instead
Linking Words
 of water.
This
Linking Words
 machine was available in Korea where the headquarters of
company
Add an article
the company
show examples
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 situated only. For some
people
Use synonyms
 living in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
areas where
available
Replace the word
availability
show examples
 of water is,
availability
Correct article usage
the availability
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
 device would have prone quite beneficial. And another reason
that's
Unnecessary verb
that
show examples
 sports
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
view
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
positive
Add an article
the positive
a positive
show examples
development
Use synonyms
 of products
availability
Replace the word
available
show examples
 in different parts of
Use synonyms
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
 is that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
Add the particle
toknow
show examples
know
Correct your spelling
now
show examples
 find their native things in any part of
Use synonyms
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
.
For
Linking Words
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
 it is observed that the students who live alone in India like to eat Maggi;
and
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
 economic and
time saving
Add a hyphen
time-saving
show examples
 option, which was not available in some European countries
such
Linking Words
 as UK Germany etc now as it's available there
also
Linking Words
 student sim quite happy about it. To conclude if the products are available in all parts of the
world
Use synonyms
, there will be more demand and it can boost
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
 of countries by increasing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Exports.
Submitted by amaadgagroo on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • globalization
  • diversity
  • homogenization
  • cultural assimilation
  • global connection
  • local businesses
  • economic impact
  • consumerism
  • standardization
  • westernization
What to do next:
Look at other essays: