IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is the positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#countries #people #products #world #development
In today's world where
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 is
bad
Change the word
badly
show examples
spread
Add the particle
to spread
show examples
 among almost all
countries
Add a comma
,countries
show examples
this
 is becoming very easy to post some item on the Internet and sell it anywhere around the world. I strongly believe that it is a positive development for both a
country
 and its
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
 to become more similar due to
availability
Correct article usage
the availability
show examples
 of all products in any reason or province of a
country
. There can be a lot of reasons to consider wed spread
product
availability
 opposite development.
Firstly
 presence of a specific type of
product
 at any corner of the globe help us to reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
luggage weight when we plan for
trip
Add an article
a trip
the trip
show examples
 to a different
country
 recently
availability
Add an article
the availability
show examples
 of a charging cable
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 my camera made it possible for me to
to
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
astonishing photos of my journey of Thailand, I
Add the particle
towant
show examples
want
Correct your spelling
won't
show examples
 be able to even use my camera if that specific cable was not available in the local market.
Secondly
Add a comma
,Secondly
show examples
 the freedom to buy any
product
 anywhere around the world
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 a
country
 economically because it
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
 the cost of
setting
Add an article
the setting
show examples
of
Change preposition
up
show examples
 manufacturing plants in every
country
 for some cheap but commonly used products. It is not sustainable for a
country
 to produce all the readily huge
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 specially for small countries like Japan and Sri Lanka
for example
 it will be impossible for Sri Lanka to set up cloth manufacturing plants due to
unavailability
Correct article usage
the unavailability
show examples
 of sufficient land and capital but wearing clothes at a very affordable cost is one of the basic needs of a low GDP
Country
. To conclude, from the above point it is clear that
availability
Correct article usage
the availability
show examples
 of any
product
at
Change preposition
for
show examples
 every reason is now a basic requirement and increasing similarity among countries is a fruitful and positive development.
Submitted by amaadgagroo on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • globalization
  • diversity
  • homogenization
  • cultural assimilation
  • global connection
  • local businesses
  • economic impact
  • consumerism
  • standardization
  • westernization
What to do next:
Look at other essays: