IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Many people today would argue that cinemas are becoming irrelevant due to new streaming services. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #cinemas #services
Nowadays, due to the emergence of the
Internet
 and other technical advancements, movie theatres are becoming useless. In my opinion, I partially agree with
this
 statement, considering that there will be an effect on big screens, but the conventional way of watching movies will not disappear permanently. In
this
 contemporary era, the introduction of the
Internet
 has totally changed human reality, and on top of it, other cutting-edge innovations are making it even better.
This
 means
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 it becomes easier to get entertainment at your fingertips as it is not necessary to travel to the cinema, wait in line, and buy a movie ticket. There are plenty of OTT(Over The Top) platforms,
for example
, available through the
internet
,
such
 as Netflix, Amazon Prime, Apple TV, etc. These websites provide unlimited content on a monthly subscription basis, which costs almost as much as a single movie ticket.
Thus
, most people would definitely prefer new web services to entertain themselves. Despite the existence of these
internet
 content providers, the traditional way of watching movies will never go out of style. Watching films in a theatre is still a feeling that one can never get at home because it is not possible to get the same quality of the screen, sound system, and most importantly, the environment.
For example
, watching Marvel superheroes on the big screen would never feel as thrilling as sitting on your couch at home and watching them.
Therefore
, multiplex theatres will always be open, but not necessarily as they used to be. In conclusion,
although
 the introduction of online entertainment platforms will be a reason for the downfall of theatres, they will always have a separate fan base that cannot be replaced by any other media option.
Submitted by jassi.sandhu601 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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