Violence on television has a negative impact on children’s behaviour. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#violence #television #impact #children’s #behaviour

Nowadays, media have strong effects on

kids

. In today’s climate, the impact of

television

violence

children

’s

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

has become a controversial minefield. It is a widely held view that watching programs that contain

violence

can have a significantly bad effect on

children

, a theory which I fully subscribe to. The main justification why watching

violence

television

is not fruitful for

kids

is that it can lead to normalization. The more bad behaviours they see, the more they believe that it's a normal action and all people do it.

For example

, currently, there are numerous

Change preposition

apply

show examples

news about Russia and Ukraine’s war on TV.

This

kind of news can be watched by

kids

and

due to

the fact that they do not focus on the context of news and they just see the images, it can lead to a wrong belief which

kids

say

its

Correct your spelling

show examples

a cool action and I should do it too. There are a few facts regarding the benefits of preventing

children

from watching violent programs on

television

. First and foremost, they

Verb problem

are

show examples

not

Verb problem

apply

show examples

familiar with bad behaviour.

In other words

, it's easier to teach

children

just good actions, until we show them

violence

and discuss it's not good. An illustration of

this

fact is that

children

at early ages copy their parent’s words and actions. What can be concluded from the discussion revolving around the effects of

television

violence

children

is that I find myself among those who believe that

this

can bring nonnegligible side effects.

Submitted by ashkanmlk80 on Fri Feb 16 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction clarity and structure

Make sure the introduction clearly outlines your stance and foreshadows the main points you will discuss. While your introduction does set the stage, it could be more precise in terms of what the reader can expect from the essay.

Argument development

Try to develop your arguments more thoroughly by providing more detailed examples and evidence. While you mention the influence of war news as seen by children, digging deeper into studies, statistics, or more varied examples could strengthen your position.

Cohesive devices usage

Link your paragraphs and ideas more effectively using a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., however, consequently, in addition). This helps in making the essay flow more naturally and aids in the overall coherence and cohesion of your writing.

Conclusion effectiveness

Conclude your essay by summarizing your main points and reiterating your position clearly. Your conclusion is on the right track but ensure it mirrors the introduction by reaffirming your stance on the issue directly.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

253 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

Desensitization
Imitation
Anti-social behavior
Aggression
Empathy
Pro-social behavior
Media literacy
Fear and anxiety
Parental guidance
Temperament
Media content
Regulation
Censorship
Self-control
Critical analysis

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
These days, too many people maintain their health by relying on doctors and medicine, rather than by following a healthy lifestyle.
It is no wonder that nowadays people prefer relying on health workers and staff rather than living a healthy life. I truly agree with this statement as I am also the one who prefers depends get maintained by doctors and drugs as it more simpler to have a treatment than do some preventive actions.
<4
band
In the future, all cars, buses and trucks will be driveless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you thik the advantages of driveless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?
To begine with, driveless vehicles are becoming coomn seen. In this essay i will go throgh the advantages of that aspect.
7
band
Most artists earn low salaries and should therefore receive funds from the government in order for them to continue with their work. To what extent do you agree? Outline
Artists are an asset to a nation. they represent the culture through their art. However, employees or companies offer a small salary for them. Therefore, some sections of society Believe that the regime should provide financial assistance. I believe the government should issue incentives for their work as they contribute to the economy and culture.
9
band
Compare the advantages and disadvantages of three of the following as media for communicating and information. State which you consider to be the most effective - comics - Books - radio - television - film - theatre Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experiance.
Without any doubt, in the present century, we have access to numerous technologies, through which we communicate and get information. Some of them are books, radio and films. However, including the large number of ,benefits these have a few drawbacks as well.
6.5
band
Some people believe that university education is essential if people have a successful life, while others think that nowadays this is not true. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, it is considered vital for high school students to pass their exams and gain a place at a reputable university. If they do so, many people argue it is very likely that they will be successful throughout their lives. However, in my view, there is no direct correlation between a university education and an enjoyable and full life.

Violence on television has a negative impact on children’s behaviour. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

These days, too many people maintain their health by relying on doctors and medicine, rather than by following a healthy lifestyle.

In the future, all cars, buses and trucks will be driveless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you thik the advantages of driveless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Most artists earn low salaries and should therefore receive funds from the government in order for them to continue with their work. To what extent do you agree? Outline

Some people believe that university education is essential if people have a successful life, while others think that nowadays this is not true. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.